Even his knees tremble, my big, bad villain.
And that’s such a happy thought, such a satisfying thought that soon I’m taking him all in.
I’m taking him in my throat.
I wonder if my slender throat swells up with his huge dick. If he can see it. If he can see that his pretty and mean cock is inside of me and stretching my throat.
I hope he can.
I really do.
I hope he can feel how much I love him.
And when he comes in my mouth and I swallow what he gives me, I hope he can feel that I’m going to do anything to give him the dream that he doesn’t even know he has.
I know something is off.
Something has to be for my father to call me into his study.
He hasn’t called me in here in months.
Usually we see each other at the office and that’s all we can take of each other. Besides, I’ve been right under his nose every day so I thought I was free.
Of this suffocating office at least.
But apparently not, because he’s called me in on Sunday morning. It’s fine though.
Fae’s at the school library; she has finals and she’s planning on spending the day studying. I’m supposed to go pick her up in a few hours. If her admission to Juilliard wasn’t conditional, based on her graduating high school, I wouldn’t even let her go.
She gets tired easily these days and I wasn’t very gentle with her yesterday after we came back from Pete’s.
What can I say, I’m a jealous motherfucker.
I’m jealous. I’m possessive. I’m afraid.
I’m fucking afraid, all right.
I’m afraid that time’s running out. That Halo will be here soon. That Fae will leave for Juilliard.
Which is ridiculous.
I’ve wanted her to get out of St. Mary’s. I’ve wanted her to go to Juilliard and away from my father. And as much as it fucking scares me that I’ll actually be a father in a few weeks, I want Halo.
I want the life I accidentally made with Fae.
Especially on the night she wanted to end things.
And now it’s all happening and I don’t know what the fuck my problem is.
But anyway, back to my father and the reason he’s called me into his office. Which he states as soon as I enter the room.
“This belongs to you, I take it.”
And as soon as I hear those words, I forget to breathe.
I forget to move.
I forget that I ever knew the meaning of being afraid.
I didn’t know. I never knew.
Not until this moment.
Not until I see what he has in his hands.
A square photo. A black and white blurry picture from the last doctor’s appointment.
Of Halo.
I snap my eyes up to my father’s face and there’s a slight triumphant smirk on his mouth. “It looks like you’ve been keeping a secret from me.”
With a conscious effort, I breathe deep.
I breathe to calm down the terror inside my body, the chill.
It’s like my bones are freezing over.
But still, I unhinge my jaw and say, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
He grazes the edge of the photo with his finger. “I think you know. I think you know exactly what I’m talking about. Although, I’m a little hurt.”
The sight of my father’s dirty, villainous hands touching something so pure is making me want to leap across the space and snatch it from him.
It’s making me want to rip his fingers off his body.
But I stay put. I try to sound nonchalant. “Didn’t know you were capable of being hurt.”
“Well, I am. I’m a sensitive man. And this is such big news. The biggest.” His smile appears wolfish, his gray eyes flashing with cruelty as he throws the photo away and threads his fingers. “My new secretary, Linda — you’ve met her — she found it on the floor by your desk and well, she let it slip in one of her, let’s say, weak moments.”
Even though he’s not touching Halo anymore and that brings a bit of relief, I still fist my hands.
I still dig my nails into my flesh.
That he found out. That my plan, my promise, failed.
“You mean, when you were fucking her,” I say.
He shrugs, sitting in his throne-like chair. “I was trying to be tactful.”
“Don’t start on my account.”
He smiles again, watching me. “You’re going to be a father, huh? That’s a big job. Being a father.”
“Yeah, you’d know a lot about it, wouldn’t you?”
“Come on.” He laughs, making my skin crawl. “Don’t be that way, son. I should be the one who’s mad. You hid it from me. You hid that I’m going to be a grandpa. And you did a good job of it, I must say. I never had a clue. Not one single clue. I feel foolish, to be frank.”
“You should. You’re not exactly bright.”
Anger flashes through his eyes but he chooses to let my dig go.