It’s not.
“I tried not to care about you and Jack,” I continue. “You told me you no longer have feelings for him, and I tried to concentrate on that. I…I just couldn’t.”
She exhales. “I know how the kiss with Jack would have seemed to you, but it wasn’t what it looked like.”
She doesn’t offer anything else, and I let her go. I hear the shower running. I know I’ve pushed her further away, and I
have no idea what I can do about it.
Chapter 27
After her shower, we have a late lunch together. The conversation is awkward. There’s so much I want to say, but I don’t know how. Finally, I give up and leave her alone, heading back downstairs to see how things are going.
When I return, Rachel is getting her makeup done. I take a quick shower and get dressed. With only my jacket left to go, I go out to the balcony.
Outside, the view is lovely as the sun sets, but everything inside me is chaos. I almost don’t recognize myself. I used to have a better handle on my emotions. I used to be in control, but with Rachel, I’m uncertain, confused.
She’s had me unsure of myself from day one.
And now it’s getting worse. I only know how desperately I want her, how I dread the thought of losing her.
When I return inside the suite, the makeup people are gone. In the dressing room, I pull on my jacket and fix my tie. As I button the jacket, I see Rachel in the mirror, standing at the door to the bathroom, watching me.
Her beauty is unearthly. Her makeup is perfect, and the deep blue stones at her ears set off the blue-green accents around her eyes. Her hair is swept to one side in an elaborate curl. She’s wearing only underwear, but I can’t imagine anything more gorgeous than how she already looks.
I should fall on my knees and worship at her feet. She deserves that, and more.
A hundred years should go to praise thine eyes and on thy forehead gaze.
“You look incredible.”
Her lips curve in a wry smile. “Thanks. I’ll just put on my dress and then I’m ready.”
There’s something about the tone of her voice that tells me everything has changed between us. I follow her to the bedroom and watch her slip on her dress, a pale blue vision that looks as light as gossamer.
I help her zip it up and she turns around to face me, that wry half-smile still on her face.
“I…” I search for a word that can do her justice. “I’m speechless.”
“Thank you.”
Lowering myself to my knees, I take each shoe from a box on the floor and carefully slip them on her feet.
“I’ll be waiting outside,” I tell her when I’m done.
She doesn’t reply, but I can feel her eyes on me as I walk away.
She joins me a few minutes later, and we go down together. We take pictures at the red carpet and she stays by my side as I welcome the guests.
In the ballroom, the theme is A Midsummer Night’s Dream, and soft lights hang from the ceiling, making it look like a moonlit night. The waiters are dressed like sprites and fairies, and there are plants and flowers gleaming with faux fireflies.
“It’s very beautiful,” Rachel whispers.
She is more beautiful. I squeeze her hand. “Thank you.”
I spend the next half-hour talking to guests and acknowledging congratulations. When Aidan arrives, I’m relieved to see his roguish face.
“Took you long enough to get here,” I scold.