I stand there frozen. We’re looking at each other, silent, but my heart is pounding, my skin heating, my whole body drowning with painful longing. How am I supposed to get over him when just the sight of him renders me confused, aching, and full of desire?
Angry with myself, and with him for making me feel so helpless, I turn around sharply, stalking towards the entrance to my building.
“Rachel,” I hear him call, but I don’t answer. I’m too angry and afraid of what will happen if I let him come too close.
With a few long strides, he catch
es up to me at the door.
“For God’s sake Rachel. Why are you running?”
I don’t look at him, but I can feel him, so close. His whole body is like a magnet, pulling me helplessly towards him. My hands are shaking, the aching hole in my heart widening painfully. I close my eyes, willing myself to be strong. I want to reach for his face and kiss him, I want to press my body to his and feel the way he wants me. My head fills with possibilities and images, of both of us, bodies entwined, in his car, maybe, or upstairs in my bed.
I try to breathe, and to dispel the erotic images from my mind, before turning to face him. “Maybe because you seem to be stalking me,” I reply, my voice surprisingly steady.
His beautiful lips move in something like a smile, and yearning floods my chest. I can’t do this, I realize. I want him too much. “Landon.” My voice is a whisper. “You should leave.”
“Why?” There is so much to the question. I don’t know how to reply, so I don’t. He makes an exasperated sound in his throat. “How was your date?” he asks bitterly.
“You came all the way over here to ask me that?” I pause, “or to make sure I didn’t end up in Jack’s bed? That’s why you called earlier isn’t it? To make sure that even though I was with him, I wouldn’t forget about you?” I fold my arms and glare at him. “Because you’re what? Jealous?”
My outburst seems to amuse Landon. He leans towards me. “Of course I am,” he whispers.
His face is so close, his vibrant eyes, his incredibly sensuous mouth. I lick my lips, an involuntary movement that he doesn’t miss. His eyes follow the motion with a fierce hunger that draws a reaction from my core. I close my eyes and breathe. He doesn’t feel the same way you feel about him, I tell myself desperately. He’ll never love you the way you want him to.
“Go away,” I whisper.
He moves even closer. “No.”
I look away from his face, reaching into my bag with one hand to fumble for my keys while pushing the outer door open with the other. Landon reaches out to hold the door for me and follows me inside the vestibule. In the small space, his proximity is harder to ignore. I find my keys and lift them to the lock on the inner door, but my hand is shaking so badly, I can hardly get them to fit.
He reaches for my hand and takes the keys from me, unlocking the door and gesturing for me to go in. I step into the lobby, tensing when he follows me.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he tells me, his voice soft. “Not until you stop lying to me.”
I snatch the keys from his hand. “I don’t know what you want to hear,” I say sharply, leaving him and heading for the stairs. He follows me, and I’m all too aware of him behind me, his eyes on me as I climb the stairs, making my legs feel rubbery. At the door to my apartment, I stop. My emotions are warring inside me. One side is screaming for me to admit my feelings to him, another side is angry with him, and with myself for not being stronger. Then there’s the sensible part of my brain, trying to persuade me to stay on course, to stay away from him and protect myself.
I turn around. Landon is at the top step, and he continues to advance until he’s only a few strides from me. My eyes fix on his chest, and I search for something to say. “I got your flowers,” I offer finally, in a vain attempt to relieve the tension I’m feeling.
He cocks his head, probably surprised by the topic I’ve chosen. “Did you like them?”
I look up at him and nod silently.
“I liked the article,” he says.
“I’m glad.” My voice sounds faint, and why do I suddenly feel like crying?
His eyes linger on my lips again. Only for a moment, but warmth floods into the lower part of my belly. The urge to walk into his arms and forget everything else is so strong, it takes all my strength to overcome it.
I suck in a breath. “Landon…” I start. I want to tell him that it’s not a good idea for him to be here, that there’s nothing else to say, but he’s already moved one step forward, his hand going to the small of my back to pull me the rest of the way towards him. He molds my body to his, lowering his lips to capture mine in a deep, searing kiss.
God! He is possessive, masterful, and so sexy, His lips slide over mine, while his tongue probes the seam of my lips, urging me to open my mouth to him. I’m unable… unwilling to resist. He slides his tongue into my mouth to tease and taste mine, and I lose all my ability to think. My stomach tightens with need so intense it’s almost painful. I moan softly and he groans in response, the sound vibrating through my body as sweet desire pulses between my legs.
With the hand at my back, he presses my body closer to his, while he explores my mouth hungrily. My breasts are crushed against his chest, and my whole body feels weak and hot, melting into his, suffused with craving for him. I kiss him back, hungry for more of the taste of his lips, desperate for his touch.
I thread my fingers through his hair, my whole being reveling in the hunger I can feel coming from him, in the hard ridge of his arousal I can feel pressed against my stomach. I grind against him as the pulsing between my legs intensifies. I want him so much. I want him inside me.
Still kissing me, Landon moves his right hand to cup the curve of my butt, while with the other, he braces his weight on the door. I want to tear off my clothes, to give him access to the most heated parts of my body. I moan against his mouth, sucking hungrily on his tongue. His answering groan is like a spark in my blood. Any minute now, I’m going to let him fuck me against the door to my apartment, regardless of the fact that anybody could walk up or down the stairs. I want him so damn much.