Clutching the phone in my hand, I dropped the niceties and demanded answers from him.
"Kova wasn't at practice today. Why wasn't he there?"
"Of course he wouldn't be there," he responded. "He's in jail where he belongs."
My nostrils flared and I forced myself to breathe calmly. "He has to be here. He's my coach, and I need him." Steady breathing… Steady… Breathing. "How long will he be in there? Why do you have to press charges anyway? Why can't you just drop them so he can leave?"
"It's what he deserves for what he did." He ground the words out bitterly. "You have no right to call me and question me on the whereabouts of the lowlife who took advantage of you. Keep this shit up and I will press further charges on that disgusting piece of shit," he shouted.
I was quiet as my anger took ahold of every part of my body from the words he just spit out.
Then I lost it.
"You can't press rape charges because I'm eighteen!" I yelled into the phone and it silenced him. My heartbeat double-timed, I'd never spoken like that to him before. "People are talking. They know he wasn't at a bar fighting a drunk guy. That's not who he is. They know it's just a cover. They know we were both gone during the same time. People are going to put two and two together." I stressed.
"Not my problem. Maybe the world needs to be aware of what kind of man he is."
"I know you lied to the police. If you don't drop the charges, I'll walk into the police station with a photo ID and have them dropped."
I wasn't too comfortable with confrontation, but I was beyond frustrated with the situation and the lies being told. I guess everyone had a breaking point.
Dad didn't respond, and I knew it was because I’d hit a nerve.
"I know what you did. The charges won't stick if I walk in there. Drop them, please. I'm begging you."
I heard an intake of air from the other end of the line. "Adrianna." My name was a warning on his lips. "Do not push me or I will withdraw any and all of your assets. You'll have nothing. You may have been living on your own, and legal in the eyes of the law, but you can't support yourself or pay for gymnastics. You have no idea the amount of money I've funneled into your gym career, or for you to live like a princess."
"Dad, I know I have no right to ask you." I tried to heed the warning, afraid he would follow through with his threat. "But please think about it. Kova needs to be here. He has to be here. The Trials are my last chance at a shot at the Olympics before everything is over." My jaw wobbled. "I need my coach."
"Maybe you should've thought about that before you spread your legs for him."
I flinched, unprepared for his cruelness. "So, this is out of spite? Because you're mad at me?"
He ignored my question. "You have everything you need, including top-notch coaches, to go to the competition. You don't need anything else. You want something else, but you're not getting it. If this isn't generous enough of me, then walk away. I'm going to keep you two as far away as possible from each other. I'll do whatever I have to do, just like any father would when a grown man touches his daughter. This is ethically wrong, and not to mention, disgusting. You're too young to understand the ramifications of his revolting actions."
Tears slid over my flushed cheeks. His venomous tone pinched at my skin. I blinked, wondering how he could say such hateful things without an ounce of remorse.
"He's my coach and I need him," I said a little too passionately. "If he doesn't show, people will dig and ask questions, wondering why the former Olympian isn't with his gymnast at the Olympic Games. Is that what you want? Because then the truth will not only ruin everything I've worked so hard for, but it'll expose you too. You won't be able to hide it."
"Fake crying isn't going to get you anywhere, and neither will your idle threats."
I clenched my hand into a fist. "I'm not threatening you. People are going to figure out why he's nowhere to be found. They're nosy, and with a few simple searches, the pieces will fall together. People will discover the fight took place in one of your buildings. Then they’ll dig further and find I live here because it's already been registered with several meets. The wheels will start turning. Assumptions and lies will be spread about all of us." I paused. "All it takes is a quick internet search, and boom."
Dad stayed quiet. If it wasn’t for the sound of the ice from his drink sloshing around in his glass, I would have thought he hung up. His continued silence made me seriously edgy. I took a deep breath and broke down, adding one final thing.
"I'll just say this and then I won't bring it up again. In a few months, all of this will be over and behind us." I reminded him softly, my voice cracking. "I'll have to walk away from gymnastics and never look back. You have no idea what that realization does to me. Gymnastics is what makes me feel alive and happy, because even though I tell everyone I'm okay, I'm really not. I haven’t been for a while now unless I'm practicing. In a couple of months, the only thing I'll have to look forward to are endless doctor appointments and a brew of pills and tests. Please," I begged, "let me just have this one thing."
A quiet gush of emotion escaped my lips. I couldn't wipe away the tears fast enough. My lips were trembling and swollen. I drew in a lungful of air and hoped he saw I was bearing my soul to him.
I hadn't lied, but I did get a bit more dramatic than I probably needed to. Though, I didn't feel bad this time. Everything I said was spoken from my raw heart and needed to be said.
"I know I've lost your trust. I know you don't believe a thing I say, but please consider dropping the charges so Kova can come back. Don't make me walk into a police station and do it. Kova has to finish this with me. Not as anything other than my coach, I swear. If you never believe anything I say again, just believe that. I need him by my side to get me through it. He is the only one who can help me."
"I'm sorry, Adrianna, but this time I can't give you what you want." Dad hung up.
I sat there in a daze. Dad hadn't shown an ounce of compassion even though I brought up his lies. I opened myself up and proved I didn't have any ulterior motives. It got me nowhere. I wished he could see it was more than just childish lust, and that Kova and I actually worked well together when it came to the sport. Kova understood my fears and turned them into positives. He saw me as a person and helped me overcome my internal battles while standing by my side. I needed him now more than ever. Two people like us didn't find each other by accident. Kova was my other half. No one in this world could ever replace even an ounce of him.
I let my phone slide to the couch. Tears leaked down my cheeks and dripped on to my arm. I used my shirt to wipe them away only for fresh ones to bloom right after. I had a horrible feeling I was never going to see Kova again, at least not any time soon.