“It’s not too late,” Tulip says. “There’s still plenty of time for that. In fact, I think we should go tonight. I heard about a fun little club in town that doesn’t ask for IDs. And there are always lots of hot boys there. We should go.”
I play along because I don’t want to have to tell them I already lost my virginity. There will be too many questions that I’m not willing to answer. If I even bring up the subject, they’ll pounce on it like two lionesses on a gazelle.
“It’ll be so much fun,” Tulip says. “A summer to remember, and the best part is we don’t have to ever see these strangers again. It’s perfect, right?”
I nod in agreement, but none of it sounds perfect to me. I had perfect. I had Ben. Being with some younger guys just sounds like a chore. But then when I think about Ben and his harsh words to me, I start to feel bitter and wonder if meeting another guy is for the best. It will help me get my mind off Ben. Maybe I’ll actually meet someone who I won’t have to keep secret forever.
I lift my chin up in defiance. “Count me in,” I say.
“I don’t know,” Annie says hesitantly. “I’m supposed to watch the boys while our parents are on their fishing trip. Those little heathens can get into a lot of trouble.”
The boys used to be real trouble makers, but they’re older now and all they seem to care about are video games. Other than sitting outside on occasion, they haven’t left the cabin for much of anything.
“They’ll be fine,” Tulips says. “They’re old enough to take care of themselves.”
“Tulip’s right,” I add. “They’re not little kids anymore. They’ll be fine.”
Annie sighs. “Fine. But if I get in trouble I’m taking the two of you down with me.”
“All for one,” I say, quoting the Three Musketeers. That’s what our parents used to call us since the three of us have been inseparable since the day we met.
“And one for all,” Tulip finishes the saying.
Annie rolls her eyes.
* * *
We take an Uber into town. I’m wearing a short summer dress that hugs all the right places and sandals that show off my fresh pedicure. We find the club Tulip was talking about and we manage to get in without being carded. I’m sure we’re going to get kicked out when Tulip orders us a couple Long Island iced teas, but again they don’t even check to see our ID. The music is even good and I’m thinking I might actually be able to have a good time despite missing Ben. I just have to keep reminding myself about the way he snapped at me and it pulls me right out of those thoughts of longing.
I look around at all the people on the dancefloor. So many happy couples smiling into each other’s eyes and holding onto one another. They look happy and they’re having fun.
Ugh. I hate them all.
I’m not having a very good time at first but then as the music starts to play and the alcohol kicks in, Tulip and Annie drag me onto the dancefloor and it’s not so bad. There are a lot of cute guys and I’m getting plenty of attention. It’s a nice distraction, I guess. There’s a boy who seems to be paying quite a bit of attention to me. He singles me out in the crowd and heads straight for me.
He’s tall with frat boy good looks, but a bad boy side with all the tattoos covering his arms. When he smiles, it doesn’t reach his eyes. Not the way that Ben’s smile changes his whole face.
Damnit Jenny, stop comparing everyone else to Ben! Why can’t I get him out of my mind? That’s what I’m here for.
“What’s your name?” he says over the music.
“Jenny.”
“That’s a pretty name for a pretty girl.”
I want to roll my eyes. That’s so cheesy. Before Ben, I might’ve fallen for a line like that. Men don’t say shit like that. Boys do. And I’m so not interested in boys. This really sucks because he’s cute. If he could just say the right thing then maybe I could be interested in starting an actual conversation with him and get Ben off my mind, if only for a moment.
Tulip nudges me and Annie winks. They give me the thumbs up, like he’s the one. If nothing had happened with Ben, maybe he would have been the one. I shake the thought of Ben out of my head. Maybe this guy could still be the one. Not to take my virginity, obviously, but to be the distraction I need right now. I’ll give him one more chance to not be lame.
We start to dance together. He’s really good at it and he smells nice and has beautiful brown eyes. I’m really feeling the alcohol now and I’m having a good time until he starts to grind up against me. He grabs my ass and his hand moves lower, trying to grab other things too. I push him away, but he doesn’t take the hint and grabs me with both hands, holding me closer. He pinches my ass so hard it almost hurts.