a sound check at four. Any takers?”
“Is there money in it?” Lula asked.
“Yeah. You'll be on Ranger's payroll.”
“I never been on Ranger's payroll before,” Lula said. “I'll do it.”
“If you represent Ranger, you have to be dressed in black. I'll meet you in the hotel lobby at three-thirty.”
“That don't hardly give me any time,” Lula said. “I gotta get home to my apartment and change my makeup if I'm wearing black. And then I got wardrobe decisions to make.”
“You have hours.”
“Yeah, but this here's important. I'm gonna be mingling with all them entertainment people. This could be my big break. I could get discovered.”
Lula left, but I stayed at the office and did some phone work on a couple skips. At three-fifteen, I swiped on some mascara and lipgloss and headed out.
At three-thirty I was in the lobby, waiting for Lula. I didn't see Brenda's stalker, but I knew he was somewhere nearby.
Lula barreled into the lobby through the front door and motored across the floor. She was in black heels and black stockings and a short, totally sequined, tight black skirt.
Her boobs were overflowing out of a black satin bustier, and she had it all topped off with a black satin tuxedo jacket. Her hair was Budweiser red. I suspected she was also wearing a Glock at the small of her back, under the jacket.
“Hey, girlfriend,” she said. “Let's rock and roll.”
“Brenda might not be too happy to see me,” I said to Lula in the elevator.
“She had a makeup malfunction on television, and at first glance, it might have seemed to be my fault.”
“Are you talking about the eyelash fiasco? Connie and me almost wet our pants.”
The elevator doors opened at Brenda's floor, and I looked out at Tank, standing halfway down the hall in front of the suite.
“It's my sweetie!” Lula shrieked, taking off at a run on the stiletto heels.
Tank froze, deer in the headlights. Except with Tank, it was more like rhino in the headlights. Lula grabbed Tank and gave him a kiss, and Tank broke out in a sweat.
“Ranger bailed on the sound check,” I told Tank, “so I brought Lula to help out.”
Tank almost smiled. He knew Ranger would have a seizure at the thought of Lula working for him.
“I'm all dressed in Rangeman colors,” Lula said to Tank.
“Yeah,” Tank said. “You look fine.”
“And I've been working on our wedding all day,” Lula told him. “I've got all the details worked out, so you don't have to worry about anything. I know you want the whole big deal with the fireworks and me in a veil and a gown with a big long train and all, so I've got it all goin' on. And all you gotta do is go for a fitting for your tuxedo.”
The sweat was dripping off Tank's chin onto his T-shirt. “Tuxedo?” he said.
“Fireworks?”
“And lots of pigs in a blanket. You like pigs in a blanket, right?”
“Yeah,” Tank said.
“Then its all settled,” Lula told him.
“I got it covered here,” I said to Tank. “Maybe you want to take a break.”