“You played way too much G.I. Joe when you were young, didn’t you?”
“Stupid Snake Eyes got me every time. Damn you!” I pointed to the sky and then looked down at the goat. “Fine, let it sniff me, but if it bites a finger off we’re swimming with sharks.”
“Deal.” Becca’s eyebrow arched.
I closed my eyes.
And felt sniffing. Licking. And . . . no biting. I opened one eye, then the other. The goat was sniffing me and then suddenly lost interest.
“Wait!” I patted his head. “Why doesn’t he like me?”
“What?” Becca burst out laughing. “First you’re afraid to attract it and now you’re mad it doesn’t like you?”
“Everyone likes me.” I leaned down. “Come on, Billy, give Uncle Max a chance.”
“Everything you just said gave me the creeps.” Becca held up her hands.
I rolled my eyes. “Maybe he needs a snack?”
“And now you want to feed it?” Becca asked, her voice rising in pitch.
“It’s the way to a man’s stomach.”
“And goats and men are what? Interchangeable?”
“They both have balls.”
“I need to find new friends.”
“You love me.” I winked. “Now let’s get him a snack. Actually, we need to find out when they’re feeding us because some of those girls look like they could use bread. Lots and lots of bread.”
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
BECCA
Finding food proved more difficult then we’d realized . . . mainly because part of the game was locating our food by reading a map. I figured I would be okay, but the others? Not so much.
The producers had already escorted away the girls who hadn’t been kissed, even though the forty-eight hours weren’t up. Max had made his choices so it wasn’t like they needed to stick around any longer. There were some tears, which really begged the question of how dating shows worked. One of the chicks had to be sedated because apparently in her mind the connection between her and Max was so strong that she’d already started naming their children.
I was actually a bit afraid for Max.
But he’d handled the situation with humor and class. Something I’d noticed about him in the past twelve hours. Even when people deserved to look stupid, he didn’t allow them to. He was sarcastic, funny, and had such a magnetic personality I almost believed it when girls said they had a connection to him.
How could they not?
I felt connected.
Then again, I was his partner for all things zombie, so maybe that was why. He’d created this “friendship” with me and it made me feel momentarily special.
“Contestants!” Rex clapped his hands and approached us on the beach. He’d changed into a white linen suit, which did nothing but make his orange complexion look more orangey. I cringed when his white smile nearly blinded all sea life behind me and fought to hide my laugh when I noticed that the suit was semi see-through. Huh, who knew guys wore Spanx?
“Welcome to the Island!”
The remaining fifteen of us did a little cheer and waited for the rest of his instructions.
“Deep in the Island there is a feast set up for you and your Bachelor. I’m pairing you off. The Bachelor will be on his own—”
“Um, sorry, what?” Max asked, his laughter forced. “Can’t I have a partner? A compass? A horse? Give me something, Rex.”
“Our Bachelor will use his skills as a wilderness expert to not only find his own way but try to do so first. Max, if you beat the women’s teams, you’ll get your first choice of two dates for the next day. If one of the women’s teams beats you, they will not only get to pick who you’ll go on your date with, but you’ll have to get rid of one of the two women on the date. Regardless, one woman will go home, but you have more power if you win because you can choose someone you are already on the fence about to leave or stay.”
“So either way I date?” Max asked.
“Right.” Rex nodded. “But if you don’t win, you don’t get to choose who you spend your time with.”
A dawning realization appeared on Max’s face as he looked around at all the women, most of them just salivating at the prospect of spending time with him. My eyes fell to Gina, aka Amazon, who made a grunting noise and then blew him a kiss. Max choked and then coughed.
“Shouldn’t be a problem.” Rex laughed. “Max here trained with Bear Grylls for two years! He could do it blindfolded.” More laughter. “In fact . . .”
Oh, no. This wasn’t good.
“We have so much confidence in Max’s skills that we’re giving the women a ten-minute head start!”
Max’s eyes narrowed. “How . . . gracious of us.” His eyes flickered to mine. Yeah, doubtful the man had any wilderness training. He screamed city boy. From his clothes to his perfectly clean fingernails and noncalloused hands. He’d probably never even seen a cow in real life, let alone hiked through the tropics. I had half a mind to feel bad for him.
“All right!” Rex chuckled. “Pair off!”
I made a beeline for Amazon and slapped her shoulder. “Partners?”
Her eyes held mine for a brief moment before scanning the rest of her options. Most of the other girls were jumping up and down, fanning themselves, applying lipstick—right, because that scared away mosquitoes and tarantulas.