“He deserves another chance.” Hudson sighed. “I think he’s finally grown up and truly regrets the mistakes he made.”
“It’s just—really complicated. I don’t understand why you’re so eager to share me with him again. It’s been great with just the two of us.” I looked down for a moment before lifting my head.
“It’s really complicated for me too. Trust me, having you back has led to some of the greatest moments of my life, but in the back of my mind—I just can’t stop thinking about what we had.” He sighed and slowly shook his head. “When I told you how I felt all those years ago, I wasn’t trying to make the relationship about the two of us—I thought it would just strengthen the bond that the three of us had.”
“Preston would have left though. He was going to college. If I had stayed, it would have just been us.” I squeezed his hand again.
“And that was okay back then, because it was his choice.” Hudson nodded. “I love you and if you tell me that you don’t want to give him another chance, I’ll respect that. I’ll cherish what we have. I told you before that I would understand if some of those old feelings returned…”
“Yeah.” I looked away and nervously chewed on my bottom lip. “I just don’t know—I need to think about it.”
Preston had definitely shown me that he could be a better man, and I didn’t believe he was the self-centered jock I thought he was when I left Andalusia. It was just really hard to forget all of the things he did—the cruel words he said to me the day I left. My heart didn’t ache for him like it did for Hudson. My body didn’t beg for his touch. Still, there was some truth in what Hudson said—I would never forget the good times we had when the three of us were together. The damage Preston did seemed to be undone. The Anderson brothers were closer than they ever were, despite everything that happened between them. Preston had never tried to push for more. He seemed to respect what I had with Hudson. I saw the pain in his eyes sometimes though—I recognized the longing. Maybe the ultimate act of forgiveness was to allow myself to open my heart to him again—to bring everything full circle.
I just don’t know if I’m strong enough for that.
25
Preston
“How’s the patient?” I walked into Hudson’s house to find Eliza sitting on the couch watching television.
“He’s okay. He sat up for a long time yesterday, but it made him really tired.” She looked up at me.
“He definitely needs sleep.” I walked to the bedroom and found Hudson fast asleep, so I returned to the living room without disturbing him.
“How was work?” Eliza looked over at me as I sat down.
“Quiet—thankfully. We had a small fire last night, but it wasn’t bad.” I leaned back against the couch. “I was able to get some rest, so now I’m wired.”
“That’s better than coming home exhausted.” She chuckled and nodded.
“Yeah, I guess so.” I shrugged. “I’m going to be here all day if you need a break. Dad said he will try to stop by tonight as well.”
“I was thinking about having dinner with my foster family tonight since you’ll be here. I promised them I would before the accident, but I haven’t had a chance yet.” She tossed the remote over to me. “Maybe you can find something to watch—I’m tired of channel surfing.”
“That’s why I stick to Netflix.” I hit the button to switch over the video streaming service.
It was hard to come to Hudson’s house and see Eliza every day, but it was getting easier. She held a special place in my heart, even if it wasn’t the one I truly wanted. During one of my visits with Hudson, he confided in me that he was open to a relationship that involved the three of us, but I didn’t see how that could be possible. Too much had happened, and he deserved the woman he loved. I could love her from afar, and probably love her as my sister-in-law one day, but what we had all those years ago was extinguished because of what I did. Coming back from that was impossible and it was time to let that hope fade. There were others out there—if I just gave them a chance. I might find a second chance at love, but it wasn’t going to be with Eliza. That much was clear. I had her friendship, and I really didn’t even deserve that.
* * *
Later that night
“Is Hudson awake? I need to talk to him.” Dad walked into Hudson’s house and I could see purpose in his eyes.
“He just laid down, but I don’t think he’s had enough time to go to sleep.” I looked up at my father. “What’s going on?”
“Come on. We need to talk. Is Eliza here?” He tilted his head to peek into the kitchen.
“No, she’s having dinner with her foster family.” I stood to my feet.
“Okay, we can fill her in later.” Dad motioned for me to follow him. “Son, are you awake?”
“Yeah.” Hudson leaned over and turned on the lamp next to his bed. “Hey Dad. I was going to stay up until you got here, but I was feeling woozy.”
“I talked to Henry Walford.” Dad’s eyes narrowed, and he looked directly at Hudson. “He said you came to see him the day that you had your accident.”
“I did?” Hudson blinked in surprise. “I don’t remember that—I remember driving towards Indian Hills—and then the accident.”