“We did.” I sighed. “Or at least I did. It wasn’t just one secret either, it was two.”
I had never told anyone about the summer I spent with the Anderson brothers. I thought about telling Melanie before I left town, but I was too brokenhearted to say the words. I considered telling her again when she asked me to come back to Andalusia because I didn’t want to revisit the past unless I absolutely had to. It was a lot easier that way. I wasn’t going to be able to be her Maid of Honor and help her plan the wedding unless I told her the truth. She needed to know why Preston just couldn’t show up at her house and expect me to talk to him. Once I started talking, everything just came out in spurts.
I told her about graduation night, losing my virginity, and then continuing to see both of them throughout the summer. I told her what Hudson said—his passionate confession that was nothing but a lie—and how Preston destroyed me. I kept the promise I made to myself and I didn’t cry as I came clean with her, but it wasn’t easy. Just saying the words out loud pulled at the scars left behind—and they wanted to rip. They wanted me to bleed, even if I had given more than my fair share of it when I left Andalusia behind.
“Holy shit.” Melanie shook her head with her mouth hanging open in surprise. “I can’t believe you never told me.”
“I never told anyone.” I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “That was how it had to be—the only way I could survive.”
“And I brought you back.” Melanie shook her head angrily and started to stand. “I’m going to give that bastard a piece of my mind.”
“Wait—he’s still here?” I looked up in surprise.
“Yeah, he wouldn’t leave.” Her jaw tensed. “But he’s going to leave now, even if I have to start hurling kitchen knives at him until he does.”
“Hold on…” I shook my head and held up my hand. “I’ll go talk to him.”
“Fuck that.” Melanie started towards the door. “You don’t need to go through that shit again. I can get rid of him, trust me.”
“This is my demon.” I balled my fists and squeezed my eyes shut. “It’s time for me to exorcize him once and for good.”
I might not have wanted to see Preston, but I couldn’t let Melanie deal with my problem—not after I told her everything. She was always very protective of me, and there was a chance she might actually throw a kitchen knife at him if he refused to leave. I had played through the last conversation I had with Preston before I left several times over the years. I thought about how I reacted, and how I should have reacted. I should have spit the vileness right back at him, called him every name in the book, and then hit him with the book itself. I was no longer that weak girl who got her heart broken. I had venom in my veins instead of fear. It was time for me to let him see that he didn’t break me—no matter how hard he tried. I let that fear keep me away for five years. The scars weren’t going to rip open, they were going to be permanently sealed—and when I left Andalusia again, I was leaving because I wanted to, not because I had to. Even if I didn’t want to admit it, I did need closure—and the best way to get it was to face my demon with both eyes open.
“Eliza…” Preston looked up at me as I walked down the stairs.
“Save it.” I held up my hand and shook my head. “I don’t know what you’ve come to say, but you can turn right around and leave.”
“I just want to talk to you.” His eyes weren’t cold like they were when he shattered me—they were kind—with a hint of remorse.
I didn’t expect to see that. No. Don’t look at him. Just cling to your strength.
“The girls in Andalusia aren’t putting out anymore? Sorry. I didn’t come back so you could—what was it? Bend me over a table for a quick fuck.” I felt my anger rising up, which was exactly what I needed.
“I’m sorry.” Preston’s head dropped. “I truly am.”
An apology? From the lips of the devil? Color me—less than impressed.
“I needed that apology five years ago. I don’t need it now.” My eyes narrowed, and I shook my head angrily. “You mean nothing to me.”
Holy shit. Did I actually say that?
“I shouldn’t.” His head slowly lifted. “But Hudson should.”
“Oh don’t go there.” My teeth came together tight enough to make my jaw hurt. “He’s the same as you—except he’s a lying little bitch. At least you were honest.”
“I lied.” Preston’s lip trembled, and I saw a tear form in the corner of his eye.
Okay, he’s the last one I expected to shed a fucking tear.
“You—what?” I tilted my head to the side.
“Hudson loved you. I lied to you when I told you he didn’t.” Preston exhaled sharply. “It broke him when you left.”
“How—how could you?” The anger was fading—the tears were coming—because that was the last thing I expected Preston to say.
“Because I’m an asshole.” Preston’s whole body looked like it was going to start shaking. “Because I loved you too—and that scared me.”
“Fuck you!” I walked up and slammed my hand into his chest as hard as I could, and I didn’t stop with just one—I kept hammering him until he staggered backward, and my arms were tired.