She firmly clamped her brain shut on that alarming thought.
‘I’m sorry. That must have been tough on you. Fourteen is an impressionable age.’
‘Some of us were flying planes solo and others were...yes...dealing with other things...’ She smiled wryly.
His gentle tone of voice had disarmed her, but then hadn’t he been full of surprises since they had got here? Hadn’t she reluctantly been forced to see him in a different light? No longer the authoritarian boss but a man who could be thoughtful in his dealings with the locals, shrewd with their concerns, ambitious on their behalf?
The way he had left his guy in charge of the entire photo shoot, allowing the man to take on the responsibility, while he, Leandro, disappeared tactfully for the day... Even though it was, in the end, an important event that could have a significant impact on the hotel either way.
‘If it had been a normal case of infidelity things might have been different.’ Emily shrugged. She had thought to have boxed the past up and sealed it away, but now it felt as though it had been lying very close to the surface indeed, controlling her behaviour and taking charge of her actions without her even realising.
Leandro listened, his head tilted to one side. He had never encouraged too many confidences in the women he dated. He had always seen that as a step through a door he did not wish to open—a door that would remain firmly shut until the right woman came along—a step towards giving them ideas that weren’t justified. But this one woman had hardly been an open book over the past two years, and the fact that she was opening up now did something to him—roused him in a way he couldn’t quite put a finger on.
‘I mean, loads of kids grow up with warring parents, and so when a divorce happens they’re braced for it. My parents never fought. They were a model couple. My father was always attentive, so when it happened it was like a bolt of thunder on a clear summer day. It was just after Christmas—beginning of January. My mother had the crazy idea to do some spring cleaning. Dad was away and she thought she’d have a go at his office.’
She banked down a stupid rush of tears at the memory.
‘I remember she was singing along to something on the radio and then there was silence...and silence... When I finally clocked that and popped in she was curled up on the floor, whimpering. There were photos all around her. Photos of a young Thai girl. With Dad and with a toddler. To cut a long story short, it turned out that the perfect husband and the perfect dad had been having an affair with this girl he’d met in a bar in Bangkok. For over five years. While my mum had been keeping the house in order and looking after me, patiently waiting for him to return from his so-called working trips abroad, he had been leading a double life. In an instant everything I’d relied on was blown apart.’
Her lips thinned into a line of bitterness.
‘It all came out in the wash, of course. He confessed to everything. Not only had the woman had his child, but at the time all of this was exposed she was seven months pregnant with their second. In a heartbeat my father went from being a man I loved and respected to a stranger who was repellent and disgusting.’
‘That’s...awful...’ Indeed Leandro could barely get his head round the enormity of such betrayal and how it must have affected an impressionable teenager.
Emily looked at him and relaxed, because what she saw on his face was genuine concern and sympathy and it felt as if those were two things she had never had before when it came to her past, because the story had never been told.
‘Is she still alive...?’
‘Yes.’ Emily glanced down, because that was where the story ended as far as Leandro was concerned.
‘And along the way you came to the conclusion that relationships with men were not to be relied upon...?’
‘We all have learning curves,’ she said with a shrug. ‘Mine just came a little earlier and a little harder than most.’
‘So you’re going to settle with a guy who makes you feel safe because if you don’t give anything to him then you can’t get hurt.’ When she didn’t say anything, he continued, changing tactic, ‘And can I ask where your father is now?’
‘Don’t know, don’t care.’ One hundred per cent true.
‘Marry this guy,’ Leandro said slowly, ‘and you build a prison for yourself.’
‘I don’t care what you think.’
‘You’ve forgotten what it is to trust because of past experience...and you’ve got it into your head that I’m just the sort of unreliable player who uses women merely because I have a healthy sex life...’
Emily’s eyes dropped to his beautiful mouth and her thoughts became muddled and uncertain. She was only aware of the sexy curve of his lips, the beauty of his face, the leashed masculine power of his body.
‘Like I said, I might have fun with women but I don’t conform to being the kind of man who could ever do what your father did. The thought of it repulses me on every level. I think you’re making a mistake, marrying this guy of yours for the wrong reasons, but in the meantime, before you settle down to a life of predictable mediocrity, why don’t you take a little time out to live a little, to let your passion rule your head...?’
Emily was vaguely thinking that he had barely skirted round the real reason she was marrying Oliver. If only he knew the steps she had been prepared to take—because, yes, if you didn’t give anything to a man, then how could you end up getting hurt?
‘I would never touch another man’s woman,’ he murmured, reaching to stroke her cheek, ‘but then again...’
His mouth met hers and he was temporarily lost, drowning in the most amazing sensation of having his kiss returned, tentatively at first, then with more of that passion he had sensed lurking below the surface.
He broke apart, breathing heavily. ‘You’re no man’s woman, are you...?’
CHAPTER SEVEN
‘PLEASE...’ EMILY PULLED away but her stubborn feet would not let her flee. She remained where she was, staring up at him, trembling like a leaf in a gale, tightly hugging herself in an attempt to impose some order on her runaway thoughts.
‘Please...what...?’ Leandro enquired softly. ‘Please take me right here...? Right now...?’
‘No’ She took a couple of steps back, trying hard to free herself from the stranglehold of his presence.
‘But you want me to...’ He closed the small gap she had created. ‘And I understand why. You’re marrying someone you shouldn’t be marrying for reasons that shouldn’t exist... You might think you’re choosing the safe option but, like it or not, you’re attracted to me and you want to explore that. Don’t you?’
‘Of course I don’t!’ She spun away, headed down to the water’s edge and felt the sea curl around her feet then ebb away. She could feel him approaching her, darkly and dangerously persistent.
She could sleep with him. Oliver wouldn’t mind. In fact he would probably applaud it. She could snatch this experience and see what it felt like to have sex with a man she was violently attracted to. It would be a first.
She stiffened when she felt his hands firmly on her shoulders.
Her thoughts were all over the place. Love was an illusion—something she could never believe in and would never fall for—but lust...
She was only finding out now that that was as real as the ocean spreading out in front of her and as full of terrifying unknowns...
The feel of his mouth against her neck sent a violent shudder through her, because she had not been expecting that. With a will of its own her body curved back against his and she heard the sound of her own soft sigh.
‘You want this,’ Leandro murmured.
He marvelled that he could keep his voice steady, because his libido was running rampant, doing all sorts of crazy things to his breathing.
‘And so do I. But I don’t want guilty histrionics afterwards... This is just us...you and me...doing what our bodies are telling us to do before you prance up the aisle with Mr Convenient...’
‘I know what you must think of me...’ Emily muttered as she slowly turned to face him.
There was so little space between their bodies that she could feel the heat emanating from him. She placed the palm of her hand on his chest and stared up at him. Every nerve, muscle, tendon was straining towards him in anticipation.
‘It doesn’t matter what I think of you...’
‘It does to me!’
‘Why?’ Leandro bent his head and kissed her slowly, tenderly, prising her mouth open with his tongue and then taking his time to taste her. He could feel her hesitancy just as he could feel her helpless craving for them to take what had flared up between them through to its logical conclusion.
What did he think of her? Did it matter? Sure, she had worked for him for nearly two years, and during that time, when he thought about it, they had developed a curiously close bond, but she would be on her way in the blink of an eye and he wouldn’t see her again.