Geraint calls daddy from the car and I drink my milkshake, listening to him talk on speakerphone again. “Tomorrow. I’ll tell you exactly where soon. Come alone.”
“Will you be alone?” my father replies.
Geraint just laughs and hangs up. “Nice fucking man, that one. Real concerned about his daughter.”
We go into an outdoor adventure store and Geraint buys two pairs of binoculars. He also buys me a plain T-shirt, some denim shorts, and a packet of cotton underwear, all that we can find in the town. I change in the bathroom, not thinking much of the outfit but glad to be wearing something else at last.
At seven in the evening, we reach Cordelia, and head into a motel. Napa is just a short drive away. I know this area well.
We eat tacos in bed together for dinner. Exhausted from the day’s drive, I fall asleep while Geraint is in the shower.
Sometime later, I’m catapulted into wakefulness, my chest heaving, my body drenched in cold sweat. I scramble to feel my throat, feeling like I’m choking. Feeling like I’m dying.
“Baby, baby! What’s wrong, are you sick?”
I feel Geraint’s hands on me and he’s searching for something that’s hurt me. It’s the blade in my throat. I can still feel it, because this time when daddy tricked me into going to Cora’s house and he followed, it was me he killed instead. I was looking on as he held Cora in his arms with the blade against her throat. The blood sprayed against the wall, but when she fell to the ground, dead, she rolled onto her back and it was my face looking back at me. And daddy was smiling.
“It was just a dream,” Geraint says, pulling me into his arms. He’s slept in the bed with me again and I press myself into the warmth of his body, needing the safety of his arms. I wish I could say all the things that were in my heart, but I’m too scared. I’ll just make everything worse, and I’m terrified of what I might lose if I tell Geraint how I feel about him. I’m scared of tempting fate, when tomorrow, he’ll be facing daddy.
Geraint pulls back a little and takes my face between his hands. “Branwen, baby, I don’t want you to come with me tomorrow. I want you to stay here where it’s safe.”
I shake my head vehemently. I’m not being left behind. I’ve changed since that night I was running and running in San Antonio. I’m brave now. He’s changed me.
Geraint looks at me for a long time, as if trying to decide something. “He’s your father, so you deserve the right to get justice for whatever he did to you.”
I angle my cheek into his hand and close my eyes briefly. I don’t know how I’m going to face him, but I know I couldn’t do it without Geraint by my side.
“But you’re still scared, and I’m not fucking having that. My girl is not going to be scared by anyone or anything. You’re going to do exactly as I say. Get on the floor. Kneel.”
I do as I’m told, slipping to my knees on the carpet and looking up at him from the floor. The faint red light from the digital clock illuminates his face, making his handsome features seem sinister. Geraint’s eyes are as black as pitch as he takes my chin between his thumb and forefinger and squeezes hard.
“Better pray, little girl. Pray for that forgiveness you so crave.”
I press my palms together in supplication to him. Waiting for his words. Anticipating his punishment.
He leans his face down to mine, seething with fury. “You think you can hide things from me, even if you don’t speak? I see it all, baby, the play of your sins over your pretty face.”
I shake my head, because I desperate
ly want to believe I’m not sinful, and he grabs a fistful of my hair.
“No, baby? Why are you lying to me?” he growls. “You’re afraid, and that’s a sin. That disrespects me. That disrespects yourself.”
He pulls me up over his lap and catches my wrists behind my back. With his other hand, he tugs my new cotton briefs up into my ass, exposing my behind, and then raises his hand. I look over my shoulder at him, even fearful of this punishment on top of everything else. I’m so scared, I’m trembling all over.
“Go on. Tell me. Are you afraid?”
I nod, tears running down my face. I’m deathly afraid, for him and for myself.
“Fear is a sin in my church. And you know how I punish sins.”
He spanks me so hard I want to scream. It hurts so bad I wrench myself around in his lap, not able to control my fight to get away from him. After a few minutes, I exhaust myself but he hasn’t stopped. The pain and heat are blazing and I sob into the sheets, knowing I have to take my punishment but feeling like I’m going to burn up.
“You don’t feel fear. You don’t feel guilt. You don’t feel shame. You don’t let anyone push you around.” He stops, breathing hard, and then pulls me up so I’m looking into his eyes. “No one but me. Those are your new sins and you better repent them hard. Now let me see the ‘Yes, daddy’ in your eyes.”
I nod, letting him see it. I’m so, so sorry. I don’t want to be afraid and he’s teaching me how. Geraint puts a hand down between my legs, stroking the wetness there that’s coating my pussy. Between my thighs, I see his cock, thick and upright.
“I’m going to fuck you hard, little girl, until you really believe that.”