I wanted a lot of things. I wanted to live in Kansas and to be closer to my dad and brother. It wasn’t a secret that Felix and Lauren were getting closer to each other. At some point, my brother was going to want to get married. They were probably going to have kids and have a cute little house and a cookie-cutter life, and I wanted to be there for that. Even if I was on the outside looking in, I wanted to be able to see my nieces and nephews once they came along.
“Any ideas which neighborhoods you’re going to look in?” Lauren asked. “I work until three every day, but I’d be happy to come look at places with you after school gets out.”
“I’d like that,” I told her honestly. “And no, I don’t know which neighborhoods I want to look at. Obviously, I don’t have kids, so I don’t need to worry about a good school district. I’m meeting with a realtor on Monday to talk about my options.”
“Good,” she said. “You went with Polly, right?”
“I did.”
“Solid choice,” Lauren nodded. “She helped Felix and
I find this place, and I thought she was really honest and fair the entire time. She always helped us understand our options and obligations.”
“Well, your house is fucking awesome,” I told her honestly. “So, I now have high hopes for my own.”
She laughed and shook her head. I liked Lauren. She didn’t seem to care if I was a little more crass than my brother, and she didn’t seem to mind that I wasn’t the perfect person all of the time. Most of my life, I’d struggled with figuring out who I was. It was only recently that I was starting to figure out what kind of person I wanted to be.
“Okay,” she said. “So, it’s a yes on the black dress for the party tomorrow.”
“Definitely,” I agreed.
“Good. I’ll let Felix know that you decided. He’ll be relieved we don’t need to go shopping tomorrow.”
I laughed.
“Shopping? Felix?”
“Yeah, he said he’d take us to the mall tomorrow if you didn’t have something fun to wear.”
“The mall? What are we? Teenagers?”
“Feels like it sometimes, doesn’t it?”
“I guess,” I said. “It’s sweet, though, that he wanted to do that.”
“Well, he at least offered,” Lauren smiled. She started hanging up the dresses I’d tried on but hadn’t chosen to wear to the party. I was going to be staying in their guest room, which also conveniently doubled as Lauren’s closet. For having a teacher’s salary, the girl loved to shop, and I was lucky enough to get to reap the benefits of that.
“He’s a good brother.”
“He cares about you a lot,” Lauren told me. “And he’s really excited about your move back.”
“Really?” I had been nervous when I’d told him I was coming back. I didn’t really know why. My brother had never been anything but supportive, and yet the idea of coming home to Kansas had been slightly terrifying for me.
“Yeah,” she nodded. “He couldn’t sleep all week.”
“That’s silly,” I said, but it wasn’t silly. It made me feel great.
“Your dad, too,” Lauren said.
“I’m glad he’s happy. I’ve missed them both. It’s good to be back.”
“Can I ask you something?” Lauren climbed onto the bed and sat close to where I was sitting. I had my legs crossed and she followed suit, imitating my posture.
“That sounds ominous,” I said.
“It is, a little,” she wiggled her eyebrows, but then laughed.
“Sure,” I said.