“Hey, you’re doing great.”
“That’s really nice of you to say.”
“Nice has nothing to do with it. When I took over Savored, I didn’t know what I was doing.” Cordelia lowered her voice conspiratorially when she said this, as though she was sharing a secret with me. “That’s the best thing about being a grownup.”
“Not knowing what you’re doing?”
“Faking it,” she smiled. “Everyone thinks we all know what we’re doing, but at the end of the day, we’re all just trying to get by.”
I nodded, and Cordelia took off. I thought about what she said, and I considered her words. Was she right? Were we really all just faking it? I started pouring the batter and I focused on what I was doing.
“One step at a time,” I told myself.
I could do this.
*
When my shift at the bakery ended, I slipped into my winter coat and headed for the front door. I waved to Beatrix, who was working the register, and pushed the door open. As I was leaving, I passed a man heading inside of the bakery. He had a cowboy hat on and muddy boots, and his jeans looked worn. There were quite a few farms and ranches surrounding Ashton, so it wasn’t a surprise that a cowboy might come into the bakery.
He smiled at me as we passed one another. He was cute. It was impossible not to notice. What would a guy like that see in a girl like me, though? I wasn’t exactly ugly, but I was worn down by the weight of the world. When I’d left Tony’s candy shop, I hadn’t just quit my job. I’d left the biggest relationship of my life. We’d been dating for the last five years, and I’d thought that if I just held on a little bit more that we’d get married.
Well, we hadn’t.
He hadn’t wanted to get married. Apparently, what he’d wanted was to sleep with the cashiers and the candymakers he hired. The girls he cheated on me with were younger, prettier, and more irresponsible than me. They didn’t demand that he act a certain way or behave in a certain way. They didn’t require Tony to do things like show up on time. They didn’t make him come to Christmas dinner at their mom’s.
Those were things I’d wanted, though.
When I’d caught him with his newest hire, I’d realized that our relationship was over, and I’d left. That was six months ago, but I was still reeling. I’d had enough savings to spend a few months nursing my wounds, but I’d finally decided to re-enter the workforce. What better way than by baking cupcakes? It was nearly impossible to mess up cupcakes.
Besides, even if you did, you had a delicious mistake to comfort you.
When I got to my car, I reached into my pocket for my keys only to realize they weren’t there. Apparently, I’d left in a bit of a rush. It had been silly to leave something so simple behind. I sighed and headed right back into the bakery. Luckily, it was still open, so it wasn’t like I’d have to do anything crazy like walk home.
“Back so soon?” Beatrix asked. She was leaning against the wall while the cowboy looked at the display to find the perfect treat. He had plenty of options to choose from. There were cookies and cupcakes and even some muffins. Savored was known for offering the best assortment of treats in town. Today’s selection was no exception. I should know: I’d designed the ensemble.
Cordelia hadn’t held back from giving me responsibilities. She’d wanted me to get comfortable with the business right away, so she’d encouraged me to start planning, creating, and designing different types of treats. I’d worked hard so far, and I was proud of the things I’d created. Hopefully, Mr. Cowboy would find something he liked.
“I forgot my keys,” I shrugged. I was embarrassed, but I tried not to let it show. The last thing I needed was for Beatrix or Cordelia to think that I was a clueless employee. I was older than both of them, yet I was the newest employee at the bakery. Sometimes I felt like I needed to prove myself. Maybe that was a silly way to feel, but it was my reality.
“I hate wh
en that happens,” Mr. Cowboy looked up at me and flashed me a dangerously handsome smile. Oh, I liked this guy. He was cute in all the best ways, and he had a sweet little dimple that let me know he was trouble.
You know, but in a good way.
It had been far too long since I’d even felt curious about a man. Tony had stolen a lot from me. At first, I’d be hurt about our breakup because I’d felt like he’d taken my time. That had been precious to me. As months passed, though, I realized he’d stolen a lot more than that. He’d taken my hope, and he’d taken my curiosity. With Tony, everything had been normal, mundane, and boring. The world had felt like a chore. Since I started working at Savored, I finally felt like the world was becoming brighter again.
“You have a lot of experience forgetting your keys?” I asked, offering him a shy smile. I reached into the hallway that led to the kitchen. There was a set of hooks there for our keys, and sure enough, mine were right there. I grabbed them and headed back toward the front door. It was quickly getting cold, and I wanted to hurry back home to nurse my wounds and have a pity party. The cowboy had something to say, though. He chuckled.
“You might be surprised what I have experience forgetting.”
“Like what?” I laughed, pausing at the front door.
“I’d forget my own name if I wasn’t careful,” he said.
“Funny.” He was, too. He was cute and he had a nice voice. Beatrix raised an eyebrow, as though she could tell I was interested in the cowboy. I blushed, embarrassed. Beatrix was young – like, recently graduated from high school young – and the idea of her knowing I was flirting with a customer was a little bit awkward for me.
“I’ll take three cupcakes,” he finally looked toward Beatrix. “One vanilla, one chocolate, and one strawberry, please.”