The two dragons are endlessly patient. They wait quietly as I prepare to climb on one of their backs. They don’t have to give me instructions for this part. I’ve been living with the dragons for a long time. While I’ve never been on a dragon before – there hasn’t been a single shifter who would have even thought about letting me near them –I’ve watched as other humans in the clan ride on their mates or friends or whatever.
So I know that the first thing I have to do is take a deep breath and calm the fuck down because dragons are really fucking huge in real life. Enormous. Giant. They’re bigger than almost anything I could have imagined. They’re so big that they tower over me, making me feel like I’m almost tiny, and at almost six feet tall, “tiny” is a feeling I rarely experience.
I breathe in and out, reminding myself that this journey is likely only going to last a few minutes. Both Lee and Jeremy kneel low, which gives me the choice of who I want to climb on. The decision to pick Lee isn’t hard, and I move next to him. He huffs out a bit of air, which I’d like to think means he’s happy with this choice, but I really can’t tell. Either way, I somehow manage to wiggle up onto his back. He doesn’t move as I carefully position myself on his body, and I remember what one of the human girls said about riding on dragons: sit close to the neck.
So instead of resting in the middle of the back, as I might naturally be inclined to do, I slide forward until I’m almost directly behind his head. I lean close, touching the top of his head. My breasts push against his neck, and I wonder if he can feel this. I wonder if he notices exactly how close we are right now. This is a part of Lee I never got to experience when we were dating. This moment feels long overdue.
“I’m ready,” I whisper, and almost instantly, Lee shoots into the air. I squeeze my legs on either side of his body and hold on as tightly as I can. It’s a little bit awkward and a whole lot wonderful. I try not to squeal in delight when I peer down at the dragon world beneath me. From up here, everything looks beautiful, green, and lush. I can see shifters walking around in both their human and dragon forms, and I’m caught off guard by just how magical this world really is.
I’ve never experienced anything like this before and I can feel my heart racing. It threatens to beat right out of my chest if I don’t calm down, so I remind myself to take a few more deep breaths.
“Calm down,” I tell myself quietly. “You’ve got this.”
As if in response, Lee seems to slow down on his path. Jeremy matches his pace, flying alongside Lee, who is obviously the leader of their group. I don’t know anything about how dragons are supposed to look when they’re flying or how they’re supposed to feel, but right now, everything seems like complete perfection.
I feel the rush of air against my face and skin, and I close my eyes to just allow myself to feel.
For once in my life, I’m not worried.
I don’t think I’m going to fall.
I don’t think anything bad is going to happen.
Lee won’t let it.
He’ll protect me.
He’ll keep me safe, at least for this journey, at least for this moment.
The only thing I need to worry about is how I’m going to feel when I land because I already know I’m going to be disappointed when the flight is over. I’m practically reaching for the stars right now and it’s been ages since I felt this alive.
Have I ever felt this alive?
There have been moments in my life when I felt excited, or happy, or interested in something. I’ve felt curious, but alive? Maybe I haven’t. Maybe I haven’t really been living. Since my breakup with Lee, I’ve been going through the motions in many ways. I’ve pantomimed living. I’ve acted like I had my life together, but did I? I’m not so sure anymore.
He swoops down and I suddenly squeal and grip his scales a little more tightly. My hair flies back behind me as he soars back up, and I can’t stop the laugh that breaks free from my lips. I laugh loudly and freely, and Jeremy looks over at me, still in his dragon form. I can’t tell what he’s thinking as he stares at me. Almost as quickly as he looked toward me, his eyes go back forward, and he continues flying alongside Lee.
Much too quickly, I notice they’re flying lower and lower, and then we’re landing. I don’t want the ride to be over, so I close my eyes as if that will somehow pause things and make this last a little bit longer.
“Time to get down, love,” Jeremy’s voice sounds beside me, and I realize he’s shifted back to his human form. Lee, however, is still a dragon, and right now, he can’t talk. He can’t ask questions. He can’t make me think about anything hard or difficult or dangerous.
I don’t say anything.
“Uh, Nicole?” Jeremy tries again. I almost feel bad for him, but I don’t want to get down. Not yet. I lean down, rubbing my body a little more closely against Lee’s dragon form. I want this moment to last forever, and if I close my eyes, I can pretend, just for a second, that it will.
I hear a door open and close.
Footsteps.
Then a woman’s voice.
“You guys, what’s the holdup?”
“She won’t get down,” Jeremy says. I imagine he’s gesturing to me, but I still don’t risk a peek. As long as I sit perfectly still on my dragon’s back, the moment won’t end. He won’t shift yet. He can’t.
“Dude, let’s go,” the woman’s voice says. “What’s your name, human?”
“It’s Nicole,” Jeremy says.