They walked together to Liam’s cottage to keep up appearances, and then she was covering her bracelet and scampering through the darkness towards the manor building.
Chapter 24
Breck lay on his back in the middle of his bed, staring at the ceiling.
He knew better than to think he was going to sleep that night, and had not even bothered to strip out of his clothing.
He felt like there were bees under his skin.
It wasn’t just wanting, it was like being incomplete, and he’d never even realized it, only muddled through in ignorance. And now he knew what he couldn’t have, had looked into the sky blue eyes of pure love… and as much as the rest of him was sure that it was his, meant for him in every way, his head knew it wasn’t.
It wasn’t just bees under his skin, it was angry bees, and his angry leopard, who didn’t understand why either of them were denying this thing that was so basic and natural.
He could think of nothing else.
The knock on his back door made his heart sink. His room in The Den had clearly been intended for the live-in help; it was less grand than the rest of the house, but had its own tiny bathroom, and most importantly, a private entrance, tucked away at the back of the house. What it lacked in view, it made up for in discreet access. That had been useful for private liaisons in the past, but now he only wished he’d never told anyone about it.
He almost ignored the knock, but his leopard urged him to answer it, and he rose wearily to open the door.
It isn’t going to be her, he told his leopard as he opened the door. It didn’t make sense that it could be her.
But it was, and all the bees inside him went absolutely mad.
“Darla,” he breathed.
She was panting and her eyes were dark with desire. The bracelet on her wrist was glowing like cheap rave jewelry and she had her opposite hand clamped over it as if she could cover the light of it.
“You can’t be here,” Breck insisted.
“I have three nights,” she challenged him. “Three nights until I have to get married and I’m bound forever.
Breck felt like a guard dog being tested with a juicy steak. He was supposed to overcome this temptation. Hard as it was — and oh, was it hard — he had to turn her away.
“You can’t be here,” Breck repeated firmly.
Then she was moving into the room, putting hands against his chest, and hissing at the contact. “I want to be here. I have to be here. Show me what might have been.”
He wanted to. He wanted to claim her mouth, her sweet body, her very soul. He wanted to lay her down on his bed and show her how to make it sing.
“It’s not fair… to Liam,” he said desperately. “You are his.” Saying it out loud made it hurt worse.
Darla paused, then gave a small laugh. “I will never be his,” she said, shaking her head. “Oh, I will be bound to him by contract, but I will never… Liam doesn’t want me. He can’t be with me this way.”
Breck felt like his brain was moving very slowly. It was very hard to think with Darla’s hand burning holes through his thin shirt. “He’s gay?” he ventured. It didn’t quite make sense.
“He’s ace… asexual. He’s not interested in anyone, he doesn’t like sex at all.” Her hands were moving on his chest, fingers barely flexing, like a kneading cat.
Asexual.
“Oh,” he said stupidly, thinking of Liam’s odd lack of reaction. He’d known there was such a thing as ace, but never knowingly encountered it before. “I thought I was just losing my touch,” he had to chuckle. “That actually explains a lot.”
I told you he wasn’t a rival, his leopard reminded him.
“He knows I’m here,” Darla said. “He’s the one who told me how to get here. Please, Breck, please… once I’m married, I won’t be able to do this, ever, and I have three days left that I don’t want to waste the way I’ve already wasted so much of my life. Please, please...”
Breck gathered her face in his hands, the silky sweep of her hair on his fingertips. He leaned close, not quite believing his luck. “If I kiss you, I won’t be able to stop,” he warned, so close to her mouth that he could feel her breath on his lips. She was straining against his hands towards him, and it took all of his willpower to wait there for her spoken answer.
“I don’t want you to stop,” Darla told him fiercely. “I want you to show me how to live.”