Jacqueline shook her head, her eyes closed. “We both know that’s not true. You want a pack. A real family.”
“I want you.”
She went on as though she couldn’t hear him.
“And I can’t give you any of that! I tried, Derek and I tried for so long, and it didn’t work. There’s something—”
She gestured painfully towards her midriff. Her mouth rounded.
Arlo grabbed her hand. He could see what word she was about to say, and he couldn’t let her say it.
“There’s nothing wrong with you.”
Jacqueline grimaced. “Come on. That’s obviously not—”
“Jacqueline.” Arlo wrapped his hands around both of hers and held them to his heart. “You’re perfect. You’re everything. The only pack I need is you. Now or ever.”
Jacqueline gulped. “You say that now. But I know how this works. You want a family, and I can’t give it to you. You’ll—you’ll end up resenting me. I don’t want to go through that again. I know it’s selfish, but I can’t. Not again.”
Her voice was shaking. Arlo could see how every word hurt her to say.
And he understood.
“Part of that is true. I have always wanted a pack,” he said. Jacqueline’s eyes locked on to his, bone-dry and wary, as though she was bracing herself for him to give in and agree with her. Well, that wasn’t going to happen. “A pack of my own. To cherish and care for. To dedicate my life to. Because the pack I was born into never did that for me.”
“But you said—” Jacqueline hesitated, and he willed her to keep going. “Shifters always look after their own.”
“Mine didn’t.” Arlo’s voice dropped as he pulled up memories he’d kept hidden deep. How could he put into words things he’d never let himself think about? He felt like he was paddling over black water. Floundering. “My first pack abandoned me after my mother died.”
“Oh, God, Arlo.”
Jacqueline rushed forward and wrapped her arms around him. Arlo let out a ragged breath. She was a lifeline in the dark, holding him safe above the murky waters.
“I traveled around by myself for a while. I was a few years older than Kenna, and I could grow a beard by then, so people either thought I was older than I was, or they didn’t care. I did odd jobs. Never stayed in one place long. I didn’t fit anywhere, and I didn’t know how to make myself fit. Losing my pack was like…”
His stomach lurched at the memory. Jacqueline shivered against him.
“I can’t imagine,” she whispered. “But the Weaver kids are their own pack, aren’t they? And they went through so much to stick together. If they lost each other…”
“It would tear them to pieces.”
Arlo’s wolf whined. Another memory surfaced: Tally, screaming her head off until she saw Arlo and Jacqueline. The memory tugged at something inside him.
“But you found a place eventually, didn’t you? Hideaway Cove. And the Sweets took you in.”
“Right…” Arlo frowned. “I found a new pack. And they…”
He shook his head. “The point is, I’ve lost, too. I know how terrifying it can be to try and find something again that’s been snatched away from you. But you can find it again. Jacqueline, I won’t be like Derek. I won’t resent you. I couldn’t.”
“But a pack—”
“A pack can be two people. Together. In love.”
Jacqueline was still holding him close. She tipped her head back to look into his eyes and he lowered his until their foreheads just touched.
“I want that with you. Us. Together. Sailing off into the sunset.”
21