d leaves you fumbling around like an idiot in the dark.” She turned toward me as we stopped by the car. “It’s a risk, and it’s messy as hell. That’s probably why a lot of people either don’t get married, or do and then get divorced.”
“I guess.” I got into the car and leaned back, closing my eyes. It was nice to have a friend that cared, but fuck I wanted to go home and dive back into my sheets. Sleep was the only safe place for me where I didn’t have to feel such a deep level of hopelessness.
“All right. Enough of this depressing shit. Mall?”
“No. The bar sounds good. Maybe a drink will chill me out a little.” I tugged at the seatbelt as she lit up in the seat next to me.
“There’s my girl. Let’s take a few shots and dance on the tables together.” She lifted her hand in a high-five. I popped her palm with the back of my hand and turned to look out the window.
“No dancing on the tables. Just make sure I don’t go home with anyone else. I don’t need another strike on my karma card, okay?” I closed my eyes and missed whatever she mumbled. It sounded like something meant to cheer me up, but she was wasting her breath. The only thing that might drag me out of the muck I was in was a call from Alfie. Even if we didn’t get back together, I still wanted to believe that I meant enough for him to call and check on me.
“We’re here.” Peyton rubbed my leg, waking me up.
I was surprised I’d fallen asleep. “Wow. I’m so sorry.” I rubbed my eyes as I got out of the car. There was no mascara to smear seeing that I didn’t put any makeup on. I wasn’t trying to impress anyone, and if I were being honest, I was trying to repel people for the night. Not that I got hit on too often at all, but just in case.
“We can go home if you want.” Peyton walked to the front of the car, and I met her there. “Seriously. I don’t want to put you in an uncomfortable situation.”
“I’m good.” I slid my arm into hers and walked into the bar. A few guys looked our way, but for the most part, it was pretty chill.
A waitress hustled us over to a table, which was odd. I was used to going up to the bar top and ordering what I wanted. Seemed they did things a little different there.
“All right. Let’s just have a few drinks and then head back to the house. I’ll just have a beer to make sure I can still drive.” Peyton reached across the table and took my hand. “And just so you know…I think you’re far too good for any of these English pricks you keep trying to go out with.”
“Yeah?” I paused as the waiter walked up. He was a cute guy about our age in a tight t-shirt and jeans that hung low on his hips. Tattoos lined his arms, and if I wasn’t wallowing in self-pity, I might have found him attractive.
“What are you beautiful girls having tonight?”
Peyton giggled. “You?”
I rolled my eyes and turned to him. “Three shots of tequila and a beer to wash it down.”
“Need salt and limes?” His eyes moved across my face, and his tone darkened just a little. The sound of his voice should have caused my tummy to tighten, but he did nothing for me.
“Yep.” I turned back to Peyton. “You?”
“A beer.” She kept her eyes on the guy who said something else and left. She gave me a look. “He was totally flirting with you.”
“So, what. I’m done with men until I get over Alfie, and even then…I’m pretty sure I’m going to focus on my career and not my love life. They both need an overhaul, and one depends on me and the other depends on someone else. I’m done chancing things. I’ll stick to the career.”
“And you’ll end up lonely.” She lifted her eyebrow and gave me a concerned look.
“No, I won’t. I have you.” I winked and leaned back in my seat, biding my time until I could crawl back into the bed she offered me and cry myself to sleep.
Things would get better, but not just yet.
Chapter Thirty-One
A week later
Alfie
The morning light glinted through the trees just outside my estate as I stood there, feeling quite numb. I flicked my sunglasses down while I waited for my driver to pull up to hide the fact that I felt like shit. Too much whiskey. Drinking used to be the guaranteed way to take my mind off my problems, but not anymore. I could seem to chase away the continual thoughts about Molly, no matter what I did.
Six days. Six bloody days since either one of us had talked to one another. My phone remained quiet no matter where I went in the city to keep myself busy. I didn’t expect Molly to call either. She wasn’t the type of woman to cling to someone desperately, but I knew she wanted to call. She wanted me to call, but I couldn’t find it in me to do it.
It was for the better. It had to be. I would soon become my father, and she would be lost in a lonely life like my mother was. It was simply for her own good that she moved on. Our love affair was incredible, but short lived.
The car pulled up to the house, and the driver got out, a warm smile on his face. “Morning, sir. How are you this morning?”