"No. I mean, yes. But it wasn't the whole reason," she said, smiling. "You were right about what you said about our last date. I'd really like a do-over. Makani and Keno... They need one, too."
"He was shitting bricks on the way over here thinking about what to say to her."
"Hey, what are you guys doing over there? You asked us to come so you could ignore us?" Makani called from where she was sitting.
"We were just grabbing some drinks," Abby said, taking my arm and pulling us into her small kitchen. She pulled two bottles of beer out of the fridge, followed by a bottle of wine. She asked me to grab some glasses out of a cabinet as she opened the bottle.
"Thank you for giving me another chance to do this right, Abby," I said. She looked up at me, holding the bottle of wine.
"Right after I said you could come, I almost called you to cancel," she said.
"Why?" I asked. Don't let it be because she regrets what we did together, I thought.
"I don't do this, Nate. You're the first person I've been brave enough to give a chance. I just remember feeling what I felt after we stopped talking and thinking I was just setting myself up again."
"You're not," I said quickly. I held both of her hands; they were cold from the bottles. "I hate myself for what I did to you, but I want a chance to make it right. Just let me show you that letting me back in isn't a mistake. Let me start with tonight." She looked up at me, biting her lip.
"I just need to know one thing," she said.
"What? Anything," I said, dead serious.
What did she want to know, because I wouldn’t hesitate to tell her. She knew things about me that nobody else knew. That stuff about Kirsten that I hadn't wanted to say before? I'd tell her anything. Everything. She was trusting me again — I wasn't fucking hiding anymore.
"Have you used since the last time we went out together?" she asked.
"No. Nothing. I'm one hundred percent clean," I said. "Twenty-eight days."
"That's amazing, Nate. I'm so happy for you," she said excitedly.
"It was you, you know. If you hadn't stopped me that night when I was throwing up, I'd still be using."
"Don't sell yourself short, Nate. If you really wanted to do it, then you would have."
I shook my head. "No Abby. You-"
"What happened with those drinks?" Makani's voice cut me off as she walked into the kitchen with Keno behind her. She stopped, noticing my hands, still holding Abby's. "Are we interrupting?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.
"No, we were just joining you. Want to grab the drinks?" Abby asked. Keno took one beer, and I took the other. Both the girls wanted wine. We walked back into the living area. Abby sat in the armchair so the three of us took the couch. Makani and Keno sat on either side of me.
"What did you guys talk about when we were gone?" Abby asked Makani and Keno.
"Mostly just waited for you to get back," Keno said.
"That would have been a perfect time for you two to sneak away somewhere to be alone," I said to him.
"You don't invite people on a double date to split up," Makani complained.
"This is the first time we've all been together and talked like this, isn't it?" Keno mused.
"The three of us have done this many times. Nate's the newbie," Makani said.
"Am I being jumped into your gang?" I asked, smiling.
"You're from the mainland; you can't join," Makani said, teasing me.
"So is Abby," I complained, not really knowing whether that was true or not. I'd never actually asked her where she had been born, I realized.
"She's an honorary islander. You're a tourist," she said.