“I don’t really have a type like that, though. Of course, I want a beautiful woman with a good ass personality, but you can have those things and be skinny, thick, fat, it don’t matter. That shit is just physical anyway. In the end, we all going to lose it one day,” I let her know, and she was still looking at me like I was kicking bullshit to her.
“The last bitch you fucked, was she skinny or thick?” she boldly asked me.
I wasn’t the type of nigga to lie or hold back from shit, so I answered her question.
“She was thick. Thick as fuck, actually,” I said, and there she was, rolling her eyes again.
“And the one before that?” she asked.
“Thick too,” I responded.
“And let me guess, your baby mama is thick too, right?” she asked me, and I nodded.
“Okay then, so don’t say you don’t have a type! It’s clear as day that thick women are your top pick, which lets me know that you weren’t just fuckin’ with me, as you put it when you said what you said to me a while back,” she said.
I let her have her piece, and when I knew she was finished, that’
s when I went in.
“You done?” I asked her, and she nodded that she was. “All those thick bitches that you sitting here getting all riled up about were just bitches that I fucked! I didn’t drop down on one knee and ask neither of them broads to marry me, not even my own baby mama. When that day comes, and I find me a little shorty that I want to settle down with, like I said, she can be skinny, thick, or fat, as long as I fuck with her personality, she’s beautiful, my kids like her, and so forth.
“Thick women just happen to be the ones who flock to me. I don’t know what it is about you skinny women. Y’all probably think I have too much dick, so y’all don’t even bother shooting your shot with me,” I threw in, and she looked at me like yeah right. I laughed and then I continued. “On some real shit, I heard skinny women can take dick better anyway, so I take that last part back,” I told her.
“Too bad that I won’t be the skinny woman who proves if you’re right or wrong,” she let me know.
I pulled down on my chin hair, and it was my turn to look at her like, yeah right. I wouldn’t say that I was cocky or no shit like that, but I never wanted any pussy that I couldn’t have. If I wanted to fuck Takari right here and right now, I would have her riding my dick before I could even find a fuckin’ condom in this bitch. Not because I had it like that, but because I was a man who knew what to say. I could talk her right out of her panties if I wanted to, but I honestly wasn’t on that with her.
Yes, she was fine, and all of that, but shorty was married. Plus, her head was fucked up right now. She could be screaming that she wanted a divorce today but would be somewhere fuckin’ that nigga next week. I was too fuckin’ crazy to let a woman play me like that. If Takari and I ever decided to fuck with each other on that level, I needed to see her name signed on that dotted line, proving to me that she was really done with ole boy. I didn’t just want to hear her say the shit. I wanted to actually see her making moves.
I ended up staying up with her until almost eight in the morning, and by the time she dozed off, I had to question myself on who talked more shit... me or her. I never had a female best friend, but when I was around her, I felt like that’s what she was. We pretty much disagreed on a lot of shit, and when we did, she would talk her shit, and I would talk mine, but the conversation still flowed. I knew I was fuckin’ with this girl in some way because when I saw that she’d dozed off, I was pissed.
As men, I feel like when it comes to sex, we’re desperate for that nut. Whether we nut from head or from fuckin’, we’re desperate for those little three to five seconds that we get when that nut creeps up on us. That’s how I felt tonight. I was desperate to keep up the conversation, so when she fell asleep, I felt like she gave a nigga the best ride of my life, and right when I was getting ready to bust, she stopped. It may sound crazy, but that’s how I felt.
I didn’t even fall asleep with her. I just pulled the covers back on the side of the bed where I would usually sleep, and I placed her there. While she slept, I just sat there, knowing that it would only be a matter of time before my kids called me, wanting to know when I was coming to pick them up.
Just as I was getting ready to stand up from the bed, the bedroom door opened. My grandmother stood at the door with her robe on that she’d been wearing since I was a little boy, and she smirked once she saw Takari and me in the bed together. She was a woman, so I was pretty sure that by this point, she’d managed to come up with all sorts of stories on what she thought happened between Takari and me last night when she didn’t have the slightest clue.
Takari’s head was damn near laying on my chest, and she was knocked out, so she didn’t even realize that the bedroom door had opened. I signaled to my grandma, basically telling her to get her ass out because I could only imagine how uncomfortable Takari would have been had she woke up and saw my grandma standing there. She finally closed the door behind her, and I laughed to myself. Had this been years ago when I was in high school, she would have beat me and whoever I had lying up in her bed at her house. Boy, has the times changed.
11
Jerrod Evans
I woke up the next morning to a bad ass migraine. My head was thumping something serious, and just when I was about to question why the hell my head was hurting the way it was, I remembered last night’s events at the birthday dinner that I attended. I had participated in throwing so many shots back to back, and now my head was paying me back for it. I rarely drank. Every now and then, I’d have a Corona or something like that, but I never drank to the point where I got myself sloppy drunk.
I had one experience during my junior year in college when I’d gotten sloppy drunk with a few of my roommates. I remembered the after effects of not knowing what took place the previous night mixed with the constant throwing up every five minutes, so I made a vow to myself that I would always keep my alcohol intake under control, but it was clear that I’d forgotten about all those vows last night.
Last night when I was out with my friends from work, I just felt like I was free of it all. Free from home, my wife, my kids, and I took advantage of it. After the first three shots of Patron were in my system, I started liking what it was doing to my body. Nothing mattered. I wasn’t uptight like I always was. I was no longer thinking about the job and how I wanted to meet a certain number this month in sales. None of that shit mattered, and the more shots I took, the less important the things of life started to become to me, and I loved that feeling.
I laid under the covers for about ten minutes, wondering why the hell the house was so damn quiet. That’s when last night events after I got home came into my mind, which didn’t do anything but further hurt my head even more. I wouldn’t blame what I did to my wife fully on the alcohol, but it did play a huge role. Without the alcohol in my system, yes, I probably still would have thrown her ass outside naked, but I don’t know if I would have gone so far as to throw the trash on her too. I’ll admit, that I was wrong as hell for doing that, so it was only right that I apologized for it.
I wasn’t trying to hurt her last night with my actions. If anything, I was just trying to teach her a lesson, and really prove to her how she would pretty much lose it all if she left me. That’s all it was supposed to be. I lay there for another fifteen minutes, just thinking of the best apology that I could give say to my wife, and then I finally got my ass up out of bed. I damn near had to drag myself to the bathroom to piss.
Once I finished that, I went over to the sink to brush my teeth. I jumped when I saw the person looking back at me in the mirror. I didn’t look like myself. I had more gray hairs on my head, so you no longer had to play hide and seek with them, I was slimmer, there were bags under my eyes, and my eyes were bloodshot red. I looked pitiful, and I knew that a lot of this had to do with the fact that I was stressing in this damn marriage.
After what happened last night, I wanted to make this shit work with Shrimp. I think that was the lowest that she and I had ever been, and I wasn’t trying to go down that road again. Maybe a new car could make up for my actions last night. I’ll just throw 100 g’s in her account and call it a day. See, the thing is, I was just hoping that whatever I had to do to get her back was enough. I remember about 50% of the things that transpired between us last night. I can’t remember everything that I said to her out of anger, so I didn’t know if my efforts to win her back would even work.
After I finished handling my hygiene in the bathroom, I walked out of the room. To my surprise, Takari wasn’t even in the guest bedroom. I knew for a fact I heard her come back inside the house early this morning when I’d unlocked the door for her. I quickly jogged down the stairs, and that’s when I saw that one of her cars were gone. I was just about to head back up the stairs to call her, just to see where she was, but I saw something shining in the kitchen. I walked over, and I saw that this woman had the audacity to take off her wedding ring and leave it there. What the fuck was she trying to prove? Scratch that, what the fuck was she trying to say?