I smiled as I listened to her. It’s one thing to hear statistics about shit like this. But when you’ve got someone who’s lived through the hell Maddie and I were going through at the moment, it’s a goddamn welcome bit of reassurance.
“Is this your… wife?” she asked.
“No,” I replied. “We aren’t married."
“Oh, I see.” Her tone sank a bit, carrying a twinge of sadness. “Well, the important thing is you are here for her now."
“Madam,” I began. “You’re the first person who’s said that to me. Thanks.”
A look of confusion came to the old woman’s face. “I’m sorry to hear that. It’s an awful thing. It gets better with time. Believe me. Whatever is going on, the emotions she’s experiencing, they will pass. And when they do, she’ll be back to her old self. You’ll see.”
Wordless, I nodded and gave her a courteous grin. As I did, I glanced around looking at the wide array of arrangements.
“Forgive me!” she said, as she clapped her hands together. “Now, here I’ve prattled on. Let’s get you something lovely for her. Does anything catch your eye?”
“Yes,” I answered. “I like it all.”
She chuckled. Her body wobbled a bit as she laughed.
“Well, I’m glad to see your spirits are improving,” she replied. “Now, follow me and I’ll make something special for you.”
“No, no,” I said, as I gestured around the entirety of the shop. “I’ll take them all.”
“O-okay…” she stammered. “Are you sure? Taking everything here will cost thousands of dollars and fill her entire room. Are you sure that’s what you want?”
“Yes, almost,” I replied with a nod, as I plucked a single rose from a nearby vase.
“What do you mean?”
I smiled as I took my billfold out of my suit pocket. “I’ll explain.”
GREY
As soon as they let me, I made my way back to Maddie’s room. It was the last place I wanted to be. It’s not that I didn’t want to see her. I did. More than anything. It’s just this goddamn hospital was an endless source of misery for both us. All I wanted to do was take her away, as far as we could fucking get.
But, that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.
I entered the room and walked towards the bed where she slept. Standing over her, I reached down and stroked Maddie’s hair. I smoothed the silky blond strands over and over for a good minute or so. I still had no idea what I would say to her when she awoke. In my head, I heard the old lady from the flower shop telling me just being here was enough.
I sure hoped she was right.
After a few more minutes, a soft moan emitted from Maddie as she stirred to consciousness. As she began to move, I stopped caressing her and slid my hands in my pockets. Her head rolled back and forth on the pillow once or twice before her eyes flickered open.
She blinked for a moment or two before our eyes met.
“Grey… Oh, Grey,” she muttered as her face turned ugly with sadness. “I’m s-so s-sorry.”
Tears poured from Maddie’s eyes as grief claimed her right away. Her despair sucker-punched me, catching me off guard. I swallowed hard and leaned down towards her, swallowing her in an embrace.
“Ohhh…” she cried as her upper body convulsed. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”
“Shhh. Maddie,” I said, kissing the crown of her head. The words came hard as I fought back my own reaction to her grief. “You have nothing to apologize for. It happens."
Maddie was inconsolable. She gasped great gulps of air between fits of sobbing. I did the best I could to comfort her as she wept, hugging her close. But this was something she had to go through and there was nothing I could do. Instead, I did my best to comfort her as the only other person whose heart hurt almost as much.
For some time, the sound of her pain filled the room. I held her close as the moisture from her tears soaked my shirt and the heat from her breath beat against my chest. All I wanted was to take the suffering away, once and for all. As soon as I detected the tiniest hint the intensity of her grief subsided, I brushed the hair away from her eyes and spoke.
“Hey, hey…” I began. “Listen the important thing is you’re okay. All I care about is making sure you get better. We will get through this.”
Soon after I’d spoken those words to her, I released Maddie from my embrace and she sunk back into the hospital bed once more. I reached for handful of tissue from a table near her bed and passed them to her.
“Thank you, Grey,” she said, as she took them from me.
I nodded as I brushed her hair from her eyes. “Of course. Don’t mention it.”
A few sniffles and several minutes later, Maddie looked at me through puffy lids and eyes laced with pink streaks from her tears. As she did, she wadded up a handful of tissues and dropped her hands to her lap.
“The doctor said it was for the best,” she whispered.
I looked down at her as she fought for words, rubbing her on the arm as she continued.
“He said I’m healthy in spite of everything that’s happened.”
I smiled as I looked at her. I admired her bravery. None of this was easy, and she was showing an awful lot of goddamn courage.
“I’m glad, Maddie.”
Maddie drew her eyes up from her lap towards mine. “I don’t expect you to stay, Grey.”
Her words caught me off guard. I swallowed my surprise. It didn’t go unnoticed. She sniffled as sadness drained away from her. In its place, a hollowness filled her tone.
“I appreciate you being here for me and wanting to do the right thing for the baby, but I don’t expect you to… be with me."
“Maddie,” I began. “There’s time to talk about things like that later. Right now, just get some rest.”
She watched me as the words came from my lips. Were they what she expected to hear? I had no clue since I hadn’t anticipated her statement. As I finished, she broke her gaze from me and returned it to her lap.
“Okay,” she whispered.
She leaned back into the pillows, and as she did, I slid my hand underneath my suit coat. Grabbing the delicate flower by its stem, I extended the rose to her. Upon seeing it, Maddie raised her hand to her mouth, covering it with tissue. Tears formed once again and trickled down her cheek. Unable to speak, she nodded and took the flower from me. Maddie lifted the bloom to her nose, inhaling its subtle fragrance.
She smiled.
MADDIE
Sliding the key into the lock of the front door to the apartment, Grey turned it and it clicked open.
“Wait here,” Grey said, as he did a half-turn over his shoulder.
I wrinkled my forehead in confusion. Leaning away from him a bit, I raised an eyebrow at him. “Why? What are you up to, Grey?”
He smirked as he turned to walk inside, but didn’t bother to reply. Grey disappeared out of sight for about a minute or so, before once again appearing in the doorway in front of me.
“Okay,” he began. “Come on in.”
Still skeptical, I kept frowning as I walked towards the entrance, but just as I approached it, Grey grabbed hold of my arm. “No, wait.”
I froze in place, my body now divided between the hallway and the foyer of the apartment.
“Uh! Grey!” I said, confused and now a bit frustrated.
“Shh!” he demanded. “Here, give me your hand and close your eyes.”
I pursed my lips as I looked at him.
“Come on,” he said. “You’ll love it. Trust me."
I shook my head and did my best to fight off a smile. Grey had never surprised me with anything before and I wasn’t exactly crazy about surprises, in general. The last thing I needed was for him to think I enjoyed it. If he did, God only knows what my life would be like.
“Fine,” I grumbled as closed my eyelids with reluctance.
With a gentle tug, Grey pulled me along. As I entered the door to the apartment clicked shut. It’s funny, I’d walked down the hallway hundreds of times, at least, but I still wasn’t sure I wouldn’t trip or bang into the wall by accident.
It’s amazing how even removing one sense can heighten the others in its absence. The pressure and warmth of our interlocked hands heated my palm as I held his tight. The echo of Grey’s loafers clopping along the marble floor as he walked ahead of me sounded much louder than normal. And most notable of them all, when we’d walked far enough to reach the living room, a subtle floral aroma hit me. We stopped and as we did, Grey released his grip and circled around behind me, covering my eyes with his hands.
“What do you see?” he asked.
“Uh!” I exclaimed. “I don’t see anything. You’re covering my eyes.”
Grey chuckled. “Come on. Sure you do. Use your imagination. Tell me what you see, Maddie.”
I inhaled a deep breath and thinned my lips in concentration. As I sucked in the last of my breath, the floral aroma I detected a few moments before now overpowered me.
“Flowers?” I guessed.
Grey grunted in agreement. “What kind?”
I shook my head and smiled. “I don’t know! I’m terrible at this. Grey, can’t I just see, please?”
“No,” he chided. “You have to name them or you don’t get your surprise."