I don’t know when, but I eventually fall asleep.
At least one good thing has come out of that night in the village.
Or, maybe two—if I count the fact that for the first time, I’m actually able to eat again. Honestly, I don’t know how I’ve made it this far thanks to that alone.
But the true blessing in disguise is that ever since that night, The Brotherhood has been mostly leaving me alone. Whatever their reasons—shame, embarrassment, or simply trying to stay out of trouble in case I decide to snitch—I’m not about to complain.
But I also know it isn’t going to last forever. In fact, when Rafael shows up at the end of the table in the dining hall with a slip of paper in his hand, I know it’s not going to last long.
Not long at all.
“Another note.”
Rafael sits down beside me and shows me the piece of paper he’s got. I glance at it, then back to my plate. There’s only one person who’s going to be sending me notes, and I want nothing to do with her.
“I’ll look at it later,” I say, piercing a potato on the end of my fork and staring at it like it’s the most important thing in the world. And it kind of is.
Beside me, Rafael snorts. “From what I’ve seen, you won’t look at it at all.” But he doesn’t push further, just sets it down on the table and digs into his own food.
I eye the folded paper with the flowery script on the outside. I know it’s from Olive. I never did give her my number, so the only way she has to contact me is by sending me notes through other students. I read the first few, all containing her phone number again, all begging me to contact her. Begging me to give her a chance to apologize.
I’ve largely ignored the rest.
I don’t want an apology. I can’t bring myself to think about that night. I get the shakes every time I try. I can’t talk to her … even when part of me knows the only reason she’s even writing to me still is because I won’t talk to her.
At first, I think she felt responsible for what happened that night, but now I’m not so sure. There’s a kind of desperation in the slant of her handwriting lately. All I can think is that she’s used to boys positively fawning over her.
Of course she’d only be interested in the one who wants nothing to do with her.
“Here they come,” Rafael says in a low voice, elbowing me to jar me out of my momentary daze. I glance up as The Brotherhood breezes by our table.
Jasper is the only one who looks at me, but he quickly looks away and keeps moving. Heath and Beck act as though I’m not even here. They walk on by without trying to take my food, or picking on me, or anything.
I guess the truce isn’t over quite yet. That, or they didn’t see the note from Olive.
I smile and stick my fork into some potatoes. I’m not about to complain. Rafael grins and shakes his head.
“They’re really ignoring you, huh?”
“Yep.” I watch their backs as they head for the food. “Maybe that night was worth it if it was the end of it all.”
“Don’t count your chickens before they hatch,” Rafael cautions me, but he’s smiling as he takes a bite of his sandwich.
We throw out our trash and head to history class together.
I stop in the doorway to the classroom, a bit stunned at the sight of the woman talking to our professor. Rafael stops next to me and I think he asks something, but I can’t be sure, since the pounding in my head grows louder and louder as I stare at her.
It’s the head of the girls’ school, Dean Robin.
She turns her head and locks eyes with mine. The professor continues talking to her, uninterrupted.
Rafael elbows me slightly, jerking me back into reality, and I shuffle alongside him to our desks, tearing my eyes away from the girls’ dean. As I sit, I glance up to see she’s still watching me.
“I see the headmistress is here,” he mumbles.
I keep my head down. “Yeah. I guess.”
“She’s looking at you real hard.”