Laura looks at me seriously then and her tone grows cold and dark. “I have to tell you something. I haven’t said it to anyone else, but I think you’ll believe me.”
“What is it?” I ask curiously.
“I think that Victoria had something to do with the explosion.” She speaks in a hushed tone. “I saw her back by the boiler room then the explosion happened. I mean, I’m not sure, but … no one else was around, and then all of a sudden there’s the explosion and the fire, and the only one back there was Victoria. It just seems too coincidental not to be connected.”
I exhale slowly and bite at my lower lip, wondering how much of what I know to share with her.
Then a terrible, evil idea forms in my mind. This is my first chance. The first chip in Victoria’s armor. All I have to do is tell the truth.
“Laura, you’ve lost so much, and I feel like you deserve to know the truth. You’re right about Victoria. She did cause the explosion and the fire.”
If Laura truly cared at all about her best friend, she’ll have nothing to do with Victoria now. That’s what I tell her.
Laura’s eyes flood with tears. She breaks down sobbing as she closes her fingers over her eyes and tries to hold everything in. When she finally wipes her face and manages to get her breath, she looks at me, and I can see so much pain in her it breaks my heart.
I didn’t like Alisha much, but I think I know how Laura feels. It would be like me losing Dana, and I know I couldn’t handle that. I don’t know how Laura is getting through it.
She grips my hand tightly. “I don’t think I can stop speaking to her! I don’t want to talk to her ever again, especially now that I know the truth, but what about Astor’s blacklist? I can’t be added to that! I mean, I’m not destitute … but I also don’t have a fortune like the White’s to protect me. I’ll be ruined for the rest of my life!”
That’s a bit of a low blow, but I take it in stride. Of course this is why she’s coming to me now.
Fire burns in me and I look Laura directly in the eyes.
“Listen, things are changing here. Half the school is against Victoria because she’s such an unbelievable bitch. You don’t have to put up with that if you don’t want to.” I take a deep breath and plant the next part of my plan. I have to force a welcoming smile on my face, something between sympathetic and simply friendly. “You’re more than welcome to hang out with me anytime. I know the boys like you, so they won’t mind you being around if you want to be. You don’t have to be glued to Victoria’s side or made to feel that if you turn your back on her that you’ll end up paying such a high price for it.”
I shake my head. “That isn’t real friendship.”
Laura’s eyes fill with dim hope, and I can see that she wants to. “I’ll think about it. I just … I’m going through a lot right now and I don’t quite know what to do. But I’ll think about it. Thank you. That means a lot.”
She takes a different tack then and I watch as her sorrow gives way to some shame. “Listen, I know that you already forgave me for this at the funeral, but I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for the way that I treated you in the past. Not because of who you are now … I mean, I was sorry before. We only did what Victoria made us do because she pressured us so much. I actually like you and I think you’re really brave. You were the first person I ever saw be truly courageous, and I admire you for that.”
There have been
a lot of people coming out of the woodwork to suck up to me since my true identity came out. So far no one’s come out and said it, until now. Most of them are full of it and I know it, but I think Laura is being totally honest with me.
Sure, she might be sorrier now that she knows I have something to offer her, but she does mean it. In her own shallow way, she really is sorry.
I can see it in her face and hear it in her voice. I’ve spent my life listening to lies from people of just about every age, and I know when someone is telling me the truth or not, and she is.
“Thank you, Laura. I appreciate that. I meant what I said too, about hanging out with us if you want to. Come to the other side of the tracks. We’re nicer.” I smile at her and she gives me a little smile in return.
I give her a hug and she leaves. I watch her go and hope that she’s going to be okay. I don’t have to wait long to find out what she decides to do.
Blair and Wills show up right before noon. Winter vacation isn’t officially supposed to start for another few days, but most of the students chose to leave after the funeral. They wouldn’t have come back at all if it weren’t for the final memorial service set for tomorrow night.
We’re supposed to have a candlelight vigil and unveil a memorial stone to commemorate the tragedy. I didn’t have to ask them to come, and I’m glad. I’m not sure I could handle to be alone for that.
I’m still struggling to come to terms with everything, but I know I don’t want to do it alone anymore.
Without classes or anyone to distract me, the days have begun to drag. I should be glad, excited, something … but instead, I’m just empty. My whole life was supposed to change, but really, it still all feels the same.
I didn’t even realize how much I missed them until I spot them heading up the hill across the lawn.
Blair hands me an envelope. “They had this for you at the front.”
I take it and turn it over. The thick textured paper is embellished with what I strongly suspect must be real gold ink lettering spelling out the name ‘White’ across the top. It’s a hand-written note from my aunt Ellen, inviting me to the house for Christmas. I sigh and chew on my lip a little.
“What is it?” Wills asks, trying to lean over my shoulder to read what it says. I hand them the paper to read themselves.