I press my hands to my face and let out a sigh. “I think you know this has nothing to do with me,” I say, looking back up. “But I’ll see what I can do.”
Astor can tell something’s up the moment I get to English Lit. He leans across the aisle and stretches one arm across the back of my chair. Where before he would have been careful not to touch me, he lets one hand trace circles around the slope of my shoulder as he asks me what’s wrong. It doesn’t matter if Mr. Davis sees anymore. Like Chris so rightly put it that day, I’m untouchable now.
His brush makes my skin tingle, but I just subtly shake my head and glance towards Victoria seated at the front of class.
“Later.”
I whisper for him and the boys to meet me at the boathouse for lunch, and then dive back into my studies.
Wills and I walk down to the boathouse together after math. His arm is around my waist, and every time we walk over a knotted root in the grass he likes to pick me up a little so I don’t trip over it. The way his fingers dig into my ribs tickles, so I’m red faced from laughter by the time we meet the other boys sprawled out on the floor inside.
I wriggle out of Will’s arms and peel my coat off to leave it on the floor. One of them had the good sense to crank up the heat in here now that it’s getting so cold outside. We only have a few more days of active sailing left before we have to spend the rest of our class indoors, reading about boats instead of actually sailing them.
Wills has gone to the window, and I know he’s thinking about the same thing. I’m going to miss what sailing class has become lately; little dates out on the water with nothing but the bobbing ocean beneath us and hot totties smuggled in thermoses.
Blair jumps up and gives me a quick kiss before helping me down onto the piles of old sails he’s arranged as a sort of cushion.
I’ve barely sat down before Astor’s turned his sharp eyes on me. “If this is about forgiving Victoria, you can forget it. What she did to you …”
“I know,” I say. “It was awful. But hear me out,” I glance at Wills, and then Blair. “I just want to know if you three have been, um, calling out some kind of strike on her.”
The way they refuse to look at one another tells me everything I need to know.
“Well, it needs to end now,” I say. “Let her wallow … but don’t torture her. Even she doesn’t deserve that.”
“I’m not sure I agree,” Blair says, sitting down beside me. He sprawls his long legs out in a tangle with mine. “But if that’s what you want Bunny …”
He looks to Astor. We all do.
He shifts his weight on the pile of sails beside me, but he keeps his eyes trained forward at some invisible point on the wall in front of him. His jaw works, that little muscle bulging in his cheek as he considers what I’ve asked.
It’s only now that I realize I’ve never asked Astor for anything before. Any of them.
I shrug Blair’s arm from my shoulder and move to straddle Astor across the thighs. At first he tenses at my touch, but then his arms reach up to grasp me at my waist and we melt into one another.
“Come on,” I say, my voice dropping low and honey-sweet. “I never ask for anything. Give me this, at least.”
His lips soften from a hard line as his eyes drop momentarily to mine. He’s not generous with his kisses like Wills and Blair, but when he does, it’s hard and intense—like a surge of power.
“It’s a big ask, Sadie,” he says, quietly.
“Is it though?” I brush back a stray lock of hair from his forehead. His hair has grown out some since his last cut. It softens him a bit, or maybe I just know him better now. I lean in closer, my eyes locking onto his. “Just let her be. She’s already lost enough, don’t you think?”
“She almost cost you your life,” he snaps. “She can never lose enough.”
I lean away from him, and I feel his grip tighten on my waist as if he’s afraid to let me go. I take advantage of this.
“Then do it for me,” I say. “I know you don’t like it … but it’s what I want.”
Wills whistles low. “She drives a hard bargain, eh Astor?”
Blair’s eyes trace my body in a long, explicit way. “I couldn’t resist anything you say, Bunny, if you were straddling me like that.”
Heat rises in my cheeks, but I don’t budge from where I sit. I feel Astor’s body stiffen beneath me, and I mean that in more than one way.
“Fine,” he says, at last. “But I don’t like her. I never have.”
“Perfect,” I purr. I lean in for a kiss, but hold off at the last second, and then draw away. “Now if you boys will excuse me …”