I swatted at his hand. “Oh my gosh, Scotty! Is sex all you think about?” Only fourteen and still a virgin, sex talk made me nervous. I hadn’t felt about any boy in my hometown the way I felt about Scotty, but I knew the summer was ending soon and most likely, so were we.
He shrugged and closed one eye. “I think about music too.” His laugh filled my ears as he leaned down to kiss my lips. “But mostly sex. What can I say? I’m a teenage boy and my loins are needy.”
This time it was my own laughter that filled my ears. “Loins? Your loins are needy? Sounds serious. You might want to see a doctor for that,” I suggested with a coy smile.
“Wanna play doctor?”
• • •
I looked up into Walker’s eyes, suddenly realizing why they’d looked so familiar in a more meaningful way. “Oh my God. Oh my God.”
My mouth instantly felt dry, as if I’d eaten a bucket filled with sand, and I choked on my words, my thoughts, my memories. My head spun as I tried to keep myself standing upright. It didn’t work and I crouched down, wrapping my arms around my knees as I lowered my head, my shoulders wracked with my sobs.
Walker instantly squatted in front of me, frantically stroking my hair and rubbing my arms, touching me, consoling me in any way he could.
Shaking my head, I looked up, my vision blurred with tears. “Scotty?”
“Scott Walker Rhodes,” he corrected gently.
“Is it really you?”
“Was I really that forgettable?” He smirked at me, but I didn’t miss the moisture that suddenly filled his eyes.
“It is you, isn’t it?” I choked out. “You look so different.”
“I finally lost all my baby fat,” he said jokingly, but it was true. “And grew about a foot since you last saw me.” He flexed his arms, making the muscles press against the sleeves of his shirt as he smiled. “And I’ve been working out.”
I half laughed. It was amazing how much he’d changed since that summer a decade ago. He was much taller now, his body lean and muscular, a far cry from the shorter, pudgier teenage version of him. His hair was now close-cropped and nearly black, very different from the long, wavy sun-bleached dark brown locks that were always falling into his eyes when he was a teenager. And his face was now the face of a man, all chiseled and lean; no remnants of his once-full cheeks remained. But those eyes, they hadn’t changed a bit.
We were just kids that summer, but looking at him now, I felt so stupid. I wanted to smack myself for not seeing it before. It seemed so blatantly obvious that the man across from me was Scotty, my summer crush from when I was only fourteen.
Old friends of my family had plans to tour Europe that summer, so they had asked my parents if we would watch the house and take care of their dogs. My parents, both teachers, jumped at the idea of spending the summer in Malibu, and I was overjoyed. Just the thought of spending the whole summer in the Johnsons’s huge beach house steps from the ocean thrilled me. I had no idea I’d leave my heart there in the sand when the summer ended.
“I–I can’t believe it,” I stuttered as I tried to form rational thoughts. “How long have you known? You’ve always known it was me, haven’t you? That was why you were trying to find me.” I spoke rapidly, the pieces of the puzzle finally clicking together.
“You look exactly the same, Madison,” he said as his fingers twirled my hair. “I mean, you’ve definitely changed,” his gaze roamed along the curves of my body, “but you still look the same.”
“Why didn’t you say anything at dinner? Or at my condo?” The wind picked up, blowing my hair into my eyes, and I brushed it back, not wanting to miss any expression on his face while my mind still struggled to put all the pieces together. Not that I was confused any longer, but I did feel overwhelmed.
Walker shrugged, suddenly looking unsure of himself. “I needed the right time. And part of me kept hoping something I would say would trigger a memory and you’d remember on your own.”
“I’m really bad with placing faces, and you’ve changed so much.” I shook my head wildly. “Plus I blocked it all out. I’d been too hurt after we lost touch. I forced myself to forget about you, pretend there was no you.”
He winced as his breath whooshed out of him. “That’s harsh.”
“It’s reality.”
“For you maybe.”
I looked up at him. “What does that mean?”
“That means that I never fucking forgot about you.” He lifted my chin with his fingers, forcing me to lock eyes with him. “Ever. And the fact that you could erase me from your memory makes me absolutely insane when I could never shake you from mine.”
I sucked in an unsure breath, my entire body overloaded with emotion. “I’m not saying that I ever really succeeded. I’m just saying that I tried.”
“Stop trying,” he said softly, just before his lips pressed against mine.
We had been relaxing on the beach, the sand cool and damp against my bare skin as we’d sat cross-legged next to each other, watching the sun drop through a fiery sky into the ocean.