I interrupted, refusing to hear another word. “You are not in love with me! Do you hear me?” I inched
closer to his body, my anger rising. “Say it!”
He stopped pacing and shook his head. “Say what?”
“Say you’re not in love with me! You just think you are because we spend so much time together, and you’re supposed to protect me. But you’re not in love with me. Not really. So I want you to fucking say it. ” I jabbed my finger into his rock-hard chest repeatedly.
He shrugged his shoulders, no words leaving his lips. I jabbed at him again. “Say it!” And then I lost it. I started crying out of pure frustration. “Say it, damn it!” I insisted, stomping my foot on the concrete.
He took a step toward me, and I firmly placed my hand against his stomach, stopping him cold. “Do you feel something for me? Anything at all?” his voice pleaded.
I wanted to kick him in the nuts right then and there and tell him that pure hatred raced through my veins for him. And well, that was something. But it would have been a lie. “Matteo, I do not feel anything for you other than friendship. I love Jack. I’ve always loved Jack. ”
“So you’re not attracted to me? This is purely a one-way street?” His lips formed a snarl, and I fought down the urge to sock him in the jaw. He’d pushed all the wrong buttons tonight.
“I’d have to be dead to not be attracted to you!”
“I knew it!” he shouted, pleased at my apparent revelation.
“But it’s not the kind of attraction that means anything!” I yelled back, my frustration boiling over so hot and thick I thought my skin might blister.
He shoved a hand through his hair in frustration before leaning toward me. “What the fuck does that even mean?”
“It just means that yes, I think you’re hot. But so does anyone with eyes! You’re a good-looking guy. Of course I’m attracted to you,” I explained, intentionally lowering my voice before continuing. “But I don’t want to be with you. I don’t want to leave Jack for you. It’s not the kind of attraction that makes me question anything in my life, if that’s what you’re asking. ”
His gaze dropped to the ground, looking like all the wind had just been sucked from his sails. “Oh. ”
Guilt seeped into my bones, making itself at home. Scenes of our time spent together ran through my mind like a sports highlights reel. Had I given him the wrong impression? Did I lead him on? Did I make Matteo think there was something between us?
“Look, I’m sorry if I’ve ever given you some impression that I wanted more from you. I don’t. And I don’t say that to hurt you, but I’m in love with Jack. I want that to be very clear. ”
“You didn’t. ” He paused, exhaling a breath so large his chest caved inward. “You didn’t lead me on. It’s just that I don’t really spend any time with anyone other than you. ”
“That’s what I’m trying to tell you. You don’t love me, Matteo. I promise you that you don’t. You just think you do because we’re always together. Maybe we should look into hiring another driver when I get back into town?”
The idea of a new driver filled me with a sliver of relief. The lines of our relationship had blurred so often that I suddenly appeared blinded by it. Matteo worked for us, but the friendship we formed often took precedence. Lines needed to be clear again—business first, friendship second. But how would I ever explain that to Jack without him suspecting something?
His face twisted as he pushed off the curb, standing above me. “Please don’t fire me. I love working for you guys. This is literally the best job I’ve ever had. Give me another chance. Please, Cassie. I’m so sorry. It will never happen again. I promise. ”
I couldn’t give him any answers, so I didn’t. Right now, I needed to get the hell out of New York and away from everyone. “I have to go. ”
“Are you going to tell Jack?” His handsome face looked nervous; it seemed strange to see him looking so undone.
“I don’t know,” I admitted. I considered keeping the kiss from Jack, and that fact alone nearly wrecked me. Omitting the truth was still being dishonest. I’d be doing the number one thing I’d insisted Jack never to do me: lie.
“He’ll kill me. ” Matteo rubbed his temples.
“Yeah. ” I couldn’t disagree. “He will. ”
I Don’t Care How Much It Costs
Jack
Watching Cassie run out our door last night practically tore me in two. I knew I had to let her go, but it fucking killed me to stand there and watch it happen. I hoped Melissa would be able to talk some sense into her. Despite all of the torment and pain I’d caused in the past, I knew Melissa still believed that Cassie and I were meant to be together. I thought I could count on that much.
I convinced myself that Cassie just needed some time away. She’d see everything clearly in a few days, and she’d come back home to me. I knew that being in the public eye could be unbearable at times, but hopefully it was worth putting up with in order to be together.
Right?