Jack was growing agitated, and I needed to tell him something. I remembered the last time I kept my feelings from him back in college. That first away game episode was a complete disaster. The two cell phone pictures that girl had shown me where Jack and some brunette were walking into a hotel room looked pretty damming. I convinced myself that Jack was cheating on me while his team played in Texas, and I refused to answer his phone calls or texts until he basically lost his shit on everyone around him. Turns out the brunette from the pictures was there to see Brett, Jack’s roommate for the weekend, but I’d never given him a chance to tell me any of that until he returned from the road trip completely pissed off at me. Had I learned nothing from that?
His phone beeped, and I watched his demeanor change from irritation to something else entirely. “Kitten,” his voice practically whispered as his eyes burned with a mixture of rage and sadness.
As I leaned against the cold granite countertop, I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t sure where to start.
“What happened tonight?” He was instantly at my side, his lips burying themselves against my neck. I sensed his restraint. He was trying desperately to keep his calm, but my hesitation in answering his question tested his resolve.
I swallowed the lump in my throat before turning to face him. “Um, your fans are mean sometimes, and the wives on the team are really bitchy. ” I cringed with my admission.
Jack’s body tensed, his hands balling into fists. “Getting beer thrown all over you is more than mean, Cass. ”
“How’d you know about the beer?”
He slid his cell phone toward me. “Dean. ” I nodded, knowing that not even Melissa could have stopped Dean from sending Jack that picture.
“What else?” He asked through gritted teeth and I played dumb.
“What else, what?”
“What else has been happening during the games? And stop trying to protect me, or whatever twisted thing you think you’re doing ’cause I’m about to fucking come undone. ”
“The fans heckle me sometimes. ”
“What do you mean, they heckle you? Heckle you how?”
“A couple guys just said some things about the pictures that have been printed is all. ” I looked away from his eyes as they narrowed. I tried to make my voice sound nonchalant, like it was all blown out of proportion, but Jack didn’t buy it.
“What pictures?” His voice sounded bitter and confused.
It suddenly occurred to me that Jack hadn’t been alerted to any of them. Of course he hadn’t. It’s not like he bothered reading the press, and if Dean didn’t tell him, then who else would? The team’s press and public relations departments stayed out of anything that d
idn’t have to do with the team or a player directly. Anything that only regarded me wouldn’t come up.
“That picture Meli texted me the other night was printed in the newspaper the next morning. And there have been a few others since then. ” I purposely avoided bringing up the one of my flipping off the crowd.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“No,” I said, staring straight past him, my gaze focused on the wall.
“Anything else that you’re not telling me?”
My eyes refocused on his dark irises, and then I blinked them closed before the next confession. I exhaled a slow breathe, “Someone tried to spit on me last night. But that’s it. ”
“Oh, that’s it?” He shook his head in disbelief before throwing his hands in the air. “This is not OK. This is not fucking OK. ” He reached for me, his body shaking with anger as he pulled me against his chest. He wrapped his arms tightly around my waist before resting his head against mine. “You can’t keep this stuff from me. I can’t stop it if I don’t know it’s happening. You have to let me in. ”
“I didn’t want to burden you. ” I admitted, feeling sort of stupid once I said the words out loud.
He squeezed my body hard against his. “You are never a burden. Do you hear me?” he asked, tilting my face up to his. His eyes squeezed closed before reopening. “I can’t believe this is happening to you. I’m so sorry, Kitten. ” He started pacing, pulling at his jet-black hair as guilt washed through me.
This is exactly what I didn’t want to happen. For Jack to be so worried about me that he couldn’t think straight. “Don’t be sorry, Jack. It’s not your fault. And I’m not unsafe. There’s security everywhere. Please, don’t do this to yourself. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. ” I performed my best impression of an overly confident girlfriend, but inside I was choking. The truth was, I hadn’t felt entirely safe, and I wasn’t sure how fine I’d be.
“Don’t worry about you?” He laughed and huffed at the same time. “That’s like asking the Chrysler Building to not be tall!”
I loved Jack’s passion for me, but I longed to calm him. I wanted to be the one person on this earth who could bring him peace and serenity, not agitation with my presence.
“Maybe Matteo should go to the games with you,” he suggested slowly, before becoming more excited as the idea sunk in. “Yeah,” he nodded. “That’s it. Matteo will go with you to the games. ”
“What? That’s crazy. You can’t ask him to do that. He’s our driver, not our babysitter. ”