* * *
Ruby: Are you still awake?
* * *
Seconds later, she shoots back a reply.
* * *
Gigi: You know I am. I’ve been waiting for the gossip. How was your date that wasn’t a date?
* * *
I bite my lip and tap out a note.
* * *
Ruby: Datier than expected.
* * *
Gigi: Ha! I knew it! Did you do the dirty deed? Is he there right now, snoring in your bed, too exhausted to move because your sex-starved little self ravaged him so completely?
* * *
I giggle like I’m closer to thirteen than thirty and reply.
* * *
Ruby: No. We decided to sleep on it before we took the next step, but the kissing was very, very nice. The nicest ever.
THAT MAN CAN KISS.
WE ARE TALKING THE FULL-ON SWOON-INDUCING, KNEE-BUCKLING VARIETY.
* * *
A GIF of a worried little girl sliding her gaze nervously toward the camera pops up on my screen.
* * *
Gigi: Uh-oh. But he’s still leaving, right?
* * *
Ruby: He is, but it’s fine. It’s perfect, actually. We’ll enjoy each other until he moves, without any worries about feelings or other complicating factors. It’ll just be satisfying, friendly boning, as the Good Lord intended.
* * *
She sends over a laughing emoji, then a longer reply.
* * *
Gigi: Is that what He intended? Good to know. I’m over relationships. The next time I meet a guy I like, I’m just going to get in, get some friendly boning, and get out. No stress, no mess, no waiting for him to confess he’s also boning half the population of Greenpoint.
* * *
I wince. Poor Gigi. Her last three boyfriends were all cheaters. It was basically the only thing they had in common.