“I didn’t. I walked in, sat on your bed, and the paper fell. I picked it up and looked at it. I didn’t read the entire thing, but I figured it’s an NDA for Lawrence.”
“You just . . . figured that without reading it?” I shake my head.
“I have the same ones. It’s pretty standard.”
“Pretty standard.” I blink. “It’s standard to make your ex-girlfriend of nearly three years sign a paper that says she won’t talk about you?”
“It is now that he’s going pro.”
“And you? Are you going pro?”
He looks away. It’s the third time in my life I’ve ever seen Jagger look unsure of something. The second was at my parents’ barbecue. The first was . . . that time that I can’t even bring myself to think about without my entire body heating up and me feeling like I need to flee.
“Tell me.”
“You tell me first. What’s wrong? Are you upset because of this?” He taps the paper in my hand, his gaze on mine again, and I realize we’re standing a little too close to each other and we’re in my bedroom and something inside me is blooming too fast for me to stomp and kill it.
I nod my head and lick my lips. His eyes clock the movement momentarily before he looks back into my eyes.
“You want to talk about it?”
“No. Do you want to talk about why you’re avoiding the conversation about you playing again?”
“No.”
“Okay then.”
He takes one step closer, his warmth enveloping me quickly. I feel myself take a breath and struggle to let it out with the way he’s looking at me. “Unless we trade a secret for a secret?”
“I don’t know what you mean,” I whisper.
“I think you do.” He’s so close now I have to tilt my head to keep meeting his eyes.
“Why do you care so much?”
“Because you look like you’ve been crying and that kills me.”
My heart slams into my chest. “Why?”
“I don’t know.” He lets out a soft breath that tickles my forehead. “I only know what I feel.”
“I can’t.” I swallow and take a step back. “This can’t happen.”
Roommates. We’re roommates. This can’t happen. Last time it happened he basically turned his back on me for good and right now I can’t handle one more bad thing. Jagger gives one single nod, searches my eyes one last time, and leaves my room, shutting the door softly behind him.
“By the way, burn the shirt you’re wearing,” he says from the other side of the door. “Or I’ll go through your things and burn it myself.”
That shouldn’t make me laugh. It definitely shouldn’t make me feel like my skin is on fire or make me want to open the door and yank him back in here, but all of those things are true. I fight the urge to do the last one though because I know it’s a horrible idea to sleep with my roommate, especially when my roommate is Jagger Cruz.
Chapter Fourteen
Jo
I take a seat near the door, a few seats down from the seat Jagger claimed for himself. I left the house extra early today and won’t be returning until after I help clean Dad’s practice tonight. It’s not that I’m avoiding Jagger per se, but I also don’t want to run into him right now. I know it’s impossible not to face him. We live together, we have this class together, and for some strange reason I can’t seem to stop seeing him everywhere. Well, the reason isn’t that strange. The last few years I’ve been able to avoid most people who attend my university because I was so busy hanging out with the Duke kids. Now that I’m here for real, I know it’s just a matter of time before I start running into people I’d avoided during that time, like my old teammates, and Jagger. Specifically Jagger Cruz. I’m purposely staring at my phone, texting Misty and asking her inconsequential things like how her night was and whether or not she got into the journalism class she needed. Mostly, I’m avoiding looking up out of fear that I’ll see Jagger and he’ll see me and I just . . . I need a moment. He almost kissed me last night. He would have if I hadn’t pulled away. Part of me is screaming what is wrong with you? And the other part knows I’m not ready for that, and even if I was, Jagger Cruz is definitely not the one. He’s not. Yes, he’s ridiculously good-looking and his body is a work of art. Yes, he’s kind and charming and all the things women look for in a man. It doesn’t change the fact that he’s an athlete and women flock to him, and at the end of the day, he’s a man and I generally don’t trust men anymore.