Returning to the bed, she handed the glasses to Jess. “Patrón Silver,” she announced, removing the cork. “You like tequila?”
“Sure.” Jess didn’t especially like the taste, but she could use a little courage in a bottle herself. She held the glasses while Cleo filled them.
Setting the bottle aside, Cleo took her glass and raised it in a toast. “To new girlfriends and all things kink,” she said.
“Amen.”
They clinked glasses and tossed back the fiery liquid. The burn felt good, the effects immediately going to Jess’s head.
“Okay,” Cleo said. “Why I left London in twenty words or less.” She blew out a breath, as if girding herself. “I wasn’t a club slave back then. I was just a pleasure sub, like you. I was a hair stylist and makeup artist in my vanilla life, and I could pretty much set my own hours. I spent every spare minute at the club, day and night. There were lots of single, sexy Doms, but wouldn’t you know, I went and fell for a married one. I fancied him something fierce, let me tell you. He would bring his wife, Annette, with him to the club, and they’d choose a pleasure sub to add to their fun. I was one of their favorites, and I scened with them whenever I could. That bloke was abso-fucking-lutely brilliant. He created all sorts of diabolical predicament bondage and erotic torture for the two of us girls, infusing it with such subtle, sexy eroticism that I would nearly climax just from hearing his voice. But of course, I was just a prop. As much as I fantasized otherwise, his heart belonged solidly to Annette.”
Something of Jess’s knee-jerk disapproval of even thinking about getting involved with a married man must have shown on her face, because Cleo hastened to add, “Don’t worry. Nothing ever happened between us, and it was a long time before he ever even knew about my ridiculous infatuation. But that didn’t stop me from dreaming about him.”
“That must have sucked big time,” Jess commiserated, her mind naturally leaping to her own problems and secret dreams. “Unattainable love. And you feel so ridiculous. Like you’re living some corny 80s pop song.”
“Exactly,” Cleo agreed with a laugh. But then she sighed. “I used to fantasize that she’d leave him, or better yet, he’d leave her. I hate to admit it, but I even used to imagine a scenario where she tragically dies, and I’m there to pick up the pieces.” She shook her head, her face darkening. “Talk about bad karma. Because that’s what happened. Annette was killed in a car accident. And though it was crazy, on some level I felt like it was my fault. Be careful what you wish for and all that.”
“Oh, that’s awful,” Jess cried.
Cleo’s eyes had filmed with tears, and Jess reached out to put a consoling hand on her arm. “But you have to know it wasn’t your fault.”
“No, I know. You’re right. I’m not that powerful,” Cleo replied with a wry grin as she wiped away a tear. “I have no secret hold over the cosmos. It was a drunk driver. The bastard swerved from his lane and hit her head-on. They were both killed on impact.”
“Jesus,” Jess whispered, aghast.
“Yeah,” Cleo said, shaking her head. “But I was still in love with sodding Master Jack. While I was very sad for his loss, I won’t lie, I was still hoping I could be the one to offer him comfort and a nice place to rest his head while he was grieving.” She patted her ample breasts and managed a rueful grin.
The smile fell away as she continued, “He didn’t even come to the club for six months. I eventually heard through the grapevine that he’d gone to the States for an extended family visit. He’s American,” she added as an aside. “An investment banker who works for a company in their London branch. I did my best to put him out of my mind, assuming he’d left London, and me, for good. But then one day he showed up at the club, dressed in his sexy leathers and ready to play. But that was all he wanted to do. Scene in the main dungeon there with a different sub every time he came to the club. Yeah, it was me sometimes, but just as often, it wasn’t.
“When we did scene, it was fucking electric. OMG, Jess, it was so amazing. I knew. I just knew in my bones we were meant for each other, and I swear, on some level, he knew it too. But when I tried to make my feelings known, he shut me down. He told me point blank that, while he thought I was a great girl and wonderful sub, he wasn’t over Annette and didn’t know if he ever would be. He enjoyed the distraction of playing the scene, but his heart apparently belonged to a ghost.”