Olivia closed her eyes as she felt the sofa dip beside her. Melanie no doubt wanted to be close to offer support. How much comforting was she going to need? Olivia had no clue because right now she felt utterly helpless. Oh, sure, her career was at the greatest point of her life, but on the personal side, Olivia had never felt more confused and empty.
“I was offered the promotion, there was fanfare and drinks until late last night so I stayed at my condo. Then I drove in early this morning and went straight to the airport to see Jax. We had sex, we broke things off, I kept my feelings bottled up, he slammed the door.”
Wow, even this abbreviated version hurt to discuss. Who knew what would happen once she started delivering details?
“That’s when I came home and opted for a run. Saw you guys, headed out, ran past Cash’s gym where I saw Jax’s truck and where I face-planted on the sidewalk.”
Her life was just one big ball of awkward lately.
“Tanner happened to be coming by, stopped and rescued me.” Olivia took in a deep breath and opened her eyes. “That brings us up to date.”
Silence settled into the room as two sets of eyes continued to just stare at her.
“Say something,” Olivia demanded.
“Have the pain meds kicked in yet?” Jade asked. “Because I only have one question.”
“Only one?” Melanie asked. “I have at least ten.”
Olivia held her hand up. “Your ten can wait. I’ll start with Jade’s one.”
Jade patted Olivia’s knee and leaned forward. “Did you tell him you love him?”
All the air vanished from her lungs. Love? She didn’t love Jax. What in the world did she know about love? How could such a whirlwind affair and arguing over business translate to love? It just wasn’t possible.
“I don’t love him,” Olivia stated. “So of course I didn’t say the words. There’s no reason to mess things up by pulling that word in.”
Melanie took her hand and squeezed. “If any man ever looks at me the way I’ve seen Jax eye you, I would be one lucky woman. My ex only looked at me with disgust and anger most of the time. I would love for someone to look at me like I was his only reason for breathing.”
Jax didn’t do that . . . did he? Olivia glanced back to Jade, who was all serious. Normally she was the friend Olivia could
go to for snarky, honest advice, but apparently, she was on board with Melanie.
“I’m pretty sure Jax doesn’t love me.” Olivia sat up a little higher, causing her ice bag to shift. Jade quickly adjusted it. “I mean, he’s never said so, he’s never asked me to stay. We have sex, we argue.”
“You went to a party with his daughter,” Jade reminded her. “You had a sleepover with them—that screams family. You took her shopping.”
“We took her shopping,” Olivia corrected. “I can be friends with Piper, she’s adorable.”
“She’s in love with you just as much as Jax is,” Melanie murmured.
Damn it. Olivia hadn’t thought of the repercussions that this would all create for Piper. There was no way Olivia could just cut things off with her. She had to continue that relationship and explain that her life was in Atlanta, but she’d always be part of the airport and Piper could call any time. The girl needed another woman in her life and Olivia could fill in temporarily . . . until Jax found someone permanently.
Pain sliced deep into her heart. The thought of another woman coming into Jax’s life was crushing. The idea that someone else would make shadow puppets with them during a storm or have movie night or do birthday parties . . . it was all too much to consume right now.
“There’s no love,” Olivia repeated, mainly to make herself feel better or at least give herself some reassurance she was doing the right thing. “Besides, Jax doesn’t need a woman in his life. He’s told me before how awful his marriage was and how he won’t do that again. He’s definitely only upset because I’m the one who ended things and I’ll be leaving town soon.”
She refused to believe anything more than that because if she thought he was having deeper feelings, then that would put a whole slew of issues in her path and she simply didn’t have the energy to jump them.
Chapter Twenty-One
Jax had just finished his preflight check when his cell vibrated in his pocket. Since his lessons were canceled for the day, he was restless and needed to get up in the sky where he could think. Piper was already getting picked up from preschool by the sitter since Jax had planned to be gone anyway. He’d still make a short day of it and get her earlier than planned, but first he needed to clear his head.
Hitting the hell out of that punching bag earlier hadn’t helped. The only thing he knew to do was get back to the way his life was pre-Olivia. So flying and spending time with Piper was his best bet to try to find some sense of normalcy in his life.
Jax pulled his cell from his pocket and read the text twice. He didn’t respond. What the hell should he do now? Didn’t he promise himself not to get tangled up with Olivia? Didn’t he preach to himself just how wrong it would be to give in to those desires that started when he’d been too young to know what to do with such emotions?
Propping a hand on the side of the plane, Jax drew in a deep breath. Some guidance from Paul would be really useful right now. Paul always had the right attitude and knew what to do in every situation.