Steph sat back, running a hand across her eyes. She felt her mother place a gentle hand on her shoulder, and she moved her own to see Elora by her side.
“You are not a wayward dreamer, Stephanie. You are my practical girl, a realist like me. You understand that a marriage based on initial attraction cannot last. We can guarantee a lifetime of security and happiness for you by choosing a man who is suitable. Why won’t you let that happen?”
Steph stared at her mother, her emotions fighting for control. She was in turmoil, but she also felt numb. She was moments away from resigning to her fate, but there was one last question that wouldn’t be held back.
“What if I never grow to love him?” she whispered.
Elora shook her head. “Those are your fears talking. Don’t listen to them. We wouldn’t pair you with anyone who wasn’t completely worthy of you. You must know that.”
Steph wasn’t entirely unsure of that, but she didn’t want to offend her mother, so she kept her reservations quiet. Elora ran a gentle hand along Steph’s hair, tucking it behind her ear.
“You’re going to be just fine, Stephanie. Look at me. I’m happy, your father is happy, we have you. Everything has a way of working out for the best.”
Steph gave in to her exhaustion then, resting her head on her mother’s shoulder. She allowed Elora to stroke her hair until she realized she was dozing off. Her mother made to stand then, and Steph stood up with her.
“Now get some sleep. You are going to need as much as you can get if you want to look fresh tomorrow, though I’m afraid it might already be too late for that. Still, an understanding husband will know that there is a little trepidation involved in this process. I’m sure he’ll understand.”
Steph wasn’t sure if her mother was talking to her or to herself, but she decided not to think too hard on it as she bade her a quiet good night.
“Is there anything else you would like to say to me?” Elora asked pointedly.
Steph knew the drill. “I’m sorry,” she said, her voice tired.
Elora nodded. “I forgive you. Now please get some sleep. We need you fresh for the morning.”
“Yes, Mother,” Steph said, opening her door and closing it behind her.
She stood with her back to the door, looking out at the crashing waves of the ocean. With the muted lights of the city upon it, the shore was still clearly visible, but the rest was a dark mass that stretched as far as the eye could see. Steph stepped out to the small veranda to get some fresh air before going to bed.
When she opened the door, a cool breeze whipped across her face, and she wrapped her arms around her middle as she stood next to the metal bars of her balcony, staring at the ocean and the vast, black mass of desert that accompanied it.
She wondered where Mehdi was. He was probably in a comfortable bed somewhere, fast asleep, moving on with his life. But what if he wasn’t? What if he was thinking of her, and the life they could have had together were it not for her impending marriage? She held out her hand, the one he had touched, and stared at it as the wind danced between her fingers.
El Farah really was a beautiful place. She could see in that moment how she could find a home here. She just didn’t want to make it with the wrong man.
Sighing, she turned back inside, shutting the door and changing into pajamas before sinking into her comfortable bed. She imagined what it would be like to have Mehdi’s strong arms around her, holding her tight, and she fell asleep to the fantasy of becoming his wife in the morning.
Anything was possible, right?
SEVEN
Steph
Steph heard muted voices outside her door.
She kept her eyes closed, breathing deeply as she lingered in her dreamlike state, comfortably settled in Mehdi’s embrace. Then reality entered her mind, and her stomach dropped.
She was getting married today.
Steph blinked a few times, feeling paralyzed. Perhaps if she never left her bed, they would forget she was in here and not make her go through with it. Perhaps pigs had already learned how to fly.
There was nothing for it. Steph would have to face her fate, and whatever happened would happen. She had to find the courage to believe that the man she was to marry would be a good fit for her. She had hardly given him any credit, constantly assuming the worst, always looking at the negative. What if, for once, she allowed herself to feel excited at the prospect of meeting her husband for the first time? What if she gave him a chance, even without knowing him?