She’d said it so matter-of-factly that Natalie was taken aback. “Three times?”
She laughed again. “Non-fatal.”
“Can you control the visions now?”
“Yes, but I won’t be allowed back on the force. It’s been tough. I feel like I was made for police work.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I still don’t have a clear purpose for these visions. Like right now. I want to help you, but all I have is a portrait. I don’t know where your wolf should lead you except—”
“Except—?”
“I know this is going to sound odd, but you looked really happy in this vision. Maybe this is simple. How did you feel when this wolf of yours showed up?”
This wolf of hers. Natalie’s thoughts shifted immediately to Grant and to the Cloister Garden. She allowed herself to experience what she’d first felt when she saw him in the dreamglide. “When Grant was walking on the grass barefoot in Mont St. Michel, I felt like the world would never be the same again. I felt, well I might as well say it, euphoric.”
Talya chuckled. “Okay, that wasn’t quite what I meant but I think it’s an important clue here. What I was asking about was when your inner-wolf, your spectral wolf, made a sudden appearance. What did you feel like then?”
Natalie felt her cheeks grow warm. That her thoughts had gone first to Grant, made her feel embarrassed, like she’d revealed too much.
“Huh.”
“What?” Natalie asked.
“Well, it seems to me that Grant means something to you.”
“That’s not possible. I don’t even know him.”
“I don’t think that matters. This is Five Bridges and you’re no longer just human. Maybe the greater issue here is that you haven’t given yourself fully to what it is to be an alter fae.”
Natalie felt something in her heart give way like a trap door beneath her that suddenly fell open. What slid through was a whole lot of fear and self-doubt. She was completely overwhelmed. But what did Talya mean that she hadn’t given herself completely to being an alter fae?
Talya kept her gaze on the candles. “I have a confession to make. I went to gifted people, good alters, from each territory, hoping to find someone who could remove my vision ability. Of course, they weren’t all honorable. One warlock with striking gray eyes suggested a good amount of time spent in his bed might take care of the problem. He was a conceited ass. But when I refused his offer, he almost charmed me anyway. And when I still refused, he stopped trying to seduce me and told me his philosophy. I’ve held to it since. I would even say it brought me some peace. Do you want to know what he said?”
“Yes. Please.”
“It wasn’t elegant at all so brace yourself. He said something like, “Only an idiot would refuse a rise in power, especially in our world. Power means survival.”
Natalie sucked in a deep breath. “Oh, God, he’s right. Even Renee said I was in a battle for survival. But why me?”
“Maybe because you can make a difference. You’re one of the good alters. And you have courage. I can attest to that. As to why you’re suddenly part-wolf, who knows? I will say this, every time I offer a portrait-vision, good things come of it. Just keep being brave.”
Natalie glanced at her. “There’s something I’ve wanted to ask you.”
“Sure. Anything.”
“Why were you in the Graveyard that night? Had those wolves attacked you in Revel then taken you out there? Because I can’t imagine you went out to no-man’s-land on your own.”
“No, I definitely wouldn’t have done that. I believe I was hunted because of my vision-gift and maybe because of my sister and her gifts.”
“The one who died?”
“Yes. I was abducted from my front yard and taken to a gambling house though I have no idea which one.”
“Was it The Sapphire C
lub?”