“Always,” I whispered and then left the room, my chest aching.
Kieran waited for me in the foyer, and from there, we joined Hisa in the Temple of Nyktos. It would only be the two of us who made the trip this time. Vonetta would remain as their parents were en route to Evaemon with their new sibling. I’d told Kieran that he should stay, but that had gone in one ear and out the other, even when I pulled the Queen card and then the I-am-a-god-obey-me line. He insisted on accompanying me, claiming that none of the others would remember the path we’d taken last time. Maybe he was right. Maybe he just couldn’t sleep or stay still either, his thoughts swirling from one horrific possibility to another. What if my plan failed? What if the draken refused? What if she hurt Casteel? What if he needed to feed? What if I needed…to feed? What would I do? I couldn’t even think about drinking another’s blood. What if I lost him? What if he lost himself again?
And I knew this wasn’t easy for Kieran. Before, he had been able to tell how Casteel was doing because of the bond. He didn’t have that now. He just had all the what-ifs I had.
“Kieran?” I asked as we made our way down the narrow tunnel.
“Poppy?”
I swallowed, my throat dry. “Are you…are you doing okay?”
He didn’t answer right away, and I thought the hand he held the torch with trembled. “No.”
I briefly closed my eyes.
“Are you?”
“No,” I whispered.
We traveled the windy underground tunnels, mostly in silence after that. There were no jokes, no real conversation at all. We passed the area of the partial collapse hours before we had the first time, and I moved ahead of him when we saw the pinprick of light. I worked my way out, and then we crossed the barren land. Making our way, I made sure it was I who stepped under the shadow of the winged women. The ground didn’t tremble. What I believed were the Consort’s guards remained under our feet. The city of Dalos shimmered in the distance as we walked toward the shadowstone Temple.
The first thing I noticed was there was no slumbering stone draken. “Where is….?”
“There.” Kieran’s steps slowed as I followed his gaze to the Temple stairs. A man with black hair streaked with silver stood in the center of them, dressed in black pants and nothing else. “You think that’s Nektas?” he asked, his voice low. “In his mortal form?”
“Maybe.” Shards of diamonds crunched under my boots.
“The wolven is correct,” the man spoke, and my brows lifted. The draken’s hearing was extraordinary. “You have returned several members less than the last time. That does not bode well.”
I stiffened as I stopped many yards from the Temple.
“If you are seeking Nyktos, you are not in luck,” Nektas continued. “He has joined his Consort once more in sleep.”
“I’m not here to see Nyktos,” I said, taking in the fine ridges all along his back. They looked like…scales.
“I understand.” A heartbeat of silence. “Or is it that you now understand the power you wield?”
Wanting to know how the draken was aware of my epiphany, I glanced at Kieran. He sent me a look that said he knew I was about to ask a rather irrelevant question.
I fought the urge and won. “I understand.”
His head tilted, but he still did not look at us. “Before you speak, you must be sure, for these words cannot be rescinded. Once you summon the flesh and fire of the gods, to protect and serve you, to keep you safe, they will be cast in fire and carved in flesh.”
My mouth dried. “I’m sure.”
“What makes you so sure?”
“The Blood Crown took what is mine. They took everything from me, and they will continue taking everything.”
“And?” he queried quietly. “You seek to use us to take everything from the Blood Crown, then? To destroy them, the cities they protect themselves in, and those who stand between you and them?”
I pressed the marriage imprint against the pouch that held the toy horse. “I seek the aid of the draken to fight the Revenants and the Ascended—to fight beside Atlantia. I do not seek to destroy the cities or kill those caught between them and me. For the most part, the people of Solis are innocent.”
“You seek to fight with the guards of the gods at your side, but you do not expect cities to fall?” He barked out a short laugh. “You are not ready for war.”
“You misunderstand,” I stated carefully. “Or I misspoke. I do not seek to do those things, but I understand that they may be necessary. I am ready for war. I would not be here if I wasn’t. But I do not plan to soak the lands with blood and leave nothing but ruins behind.”