“The world lost a lot of its magic when they shifted us,” Jilo said. “The witches, like yo’ family. They try and act like they did some noble thing for the rest of us. But all they did was take every last bit of the magic left in this world for themselves. They built a kingdom where they the kings, and they can do whatever the hell they want with the rest of us. And Jilo s’posed to act like they doin’ her a favor.”
I disagreed with her interpretation, but Jilo didn’t give me the chance to respond. She had already shifted gears anyway. “Jilo sure love to see that Ginny’s face right now. The look she get when she see you standing here before Mother Jilo asking her for help to steal yo’ sister’s man.” She cackled and spat on the ground.
“You don’t understand. I don’t want to take Jackson from Maisie,” I said. “There’s another boy. His name is Peter. He’s my…I’m not sure what he is. Outside of Maisie he’s the best friend I ever had. He’s wonderful. He’s perfect. He should be my boyfriend. He loves me, and I want you to make me fall in love with him.”
Jilo tore the night apart with her amused screech. The night birds stopped their calls, and even the insects fell silent in wonder. Although we stood in the moon’s low light, I could still see the tears streaming from her eyes. It took some moments for her to pull herself back together. I felt the blood rush to my face, the heat of embarrassment changing into anger. “You want Mother to work a love spell on you?” She shook her head incredulously. “You ain’t got no idea how magic work, do you?” she asked, but the sharpness in her tone had given way to something like sympathy.
Her softness got to me in a way her derision had not. “I’m sorry,” I said backing away hastily. “I shouldn’t have wasted your time. I didn’t realize you couldn’t work the spell.”
“Not so fast, missy. Jilo never said she couldn’t work this spell you wantin’. She just say you don’t understand what it would take.”
“I said I can pay you,” I replied tersely.
“Lord help, girl. Jilo ain’t talkin’ about money. She talking about mojo.” She looked at me as if she were being asked to explain green to grass. “When people come to Jilo for a love spell, they come with a fire inside them. They burnin’ for the person they want, and Jilo use they fire to work the spell. You come to Jilo lovin’ the one man and wanting her to make you love another. They nothing but guilt in you. Guilt for lovin’ the one. Guilt for not lovin’ t’other. Jilo, she can use guilt for laying down revenge, but she sure can’t use it for love.”
“Then what would it take for you to work the spell for me?”
“Blood,” she spat at me. “It take blood!”
“I couldn’t let you hurt an animal for me,” I eyed the burlap guiltily.
“It take a lot more blood than the hen Jilo got in this croaker sack,” she responded.
“You could use my blood.” I just couldn’t carry on feeling the way I felt for Jackson, knowing how much Maisie loved him, and how devoted Peter was to me. Even if my feelings weren’t wrong, they were dangerous and destructive, and they were burning me up inside. I had to find a way to control them, not let them control me. If I could have found the strength in myself to do so, I wouldn’t be standing here offering my blood to Jilo, but I had no strength when it came to Jackson.
She shook her head again. “It take all the blood you got. And then the spell do you no good anyway.”
“I can’t hurt anyone,” I said, realizing my case was hopeless.
“Mercy. Folk like us, like you and Jilo. We want power, we got to be willing to sacrifice for it. You love your sister, right?”
“Yes, of course I do. That’s why I’m here,” I responded.
“Well Jilo loved her sister too. Jilo loved her more than anything in the whole wide world. And this crossroad where we standin’. This here where Jilo done buried her. Jilo cut her and buried her right here, right beneath your pretty little feet. Jilo buried her while she still breathing, so that her blood and spirit would spill into the ground. That why this crossroad and the power in it belong to Jilo.”
“I can’t do this. I can’t be here,” I said, my head starting to spin. My stomach lurched at the thought of being near this woman for even a moment longer.
“People like us, we gotta make a wound to draw from. If you ain’t willing to sacrifice, you ain’t never gonna know the power. Jilo get this much mojo from her sister, imagine what you could do with yo’ Maisie in the ground beneath yo’ feet.” She stopped and leered at me, licking the spittle from around her lips. “My sister, she about dry now. But that Maisie. You could draw off her forever.”
“I’m leaving now,” I said, more for my own benefit than hers. I was not like her, and I never would be. I started to walk away.
“Jilo gonna work that spell for you.”
I stopped and turned back toward her. “I changed my mind. I don’t want your help. Forget I came.”
“Too late,” she replied. “You done asked.”
“I won’t give you anything. I won’t pay you.”
“Jilo don’ care, little girl. She gonna do it, just ’cause she lookin’ forward to see how it gonna play out.”
I started walking again, forcing myself not to run. I prayed to God and all my ancestors that she was bluffing. Getting what I wanted, what I came to this crossroads for, would be a curse now, knowing now its source was rooted in murder.
“You give my best to Ginny,” she called out behind me, squawks of laughter mixing again with hacks of phlegm.
THREE