Claudia straightened. “You don’t think they were heading to the portal? Did you see something?”
“No.” I didn’t have a vision. “I just…they didn’t seem like they were moving toward campus.” Did they? Was I wrong? “I guess not until the end of the fight, and that could’ve been just a random retreat.” I yanked my rubber band from my hair, letting my damp hair down. I hadn’t washed it in the shower, but it’d still gotten a little wet.
“I don’t know. I didn’t think about it.” Claudia let out a breath. “I was just surprised it was vampires. I should’ve left you with more vials, but I didn’t—”
“Don’t worry about that. We haven’t seen any in forever. I was starting to think we killed them all off.” I blew out a breath. “Forget about them coming for the cabin thing. I’m tired and reading too much into it.”
One hefty benefit of being a werewolf was that my visions were much rarer now. I had to expend effort to have one. And those that came on by themselves only came when things were really getting bad. I hadn’t had any visions about this attack, which probably meant it was just a one-off thing.
And yet, I had this worry buzzing around my head. I didn’t like to ignore my gut feelings, and it felt like the vampires were coming for us. I just didn’t have any proof of that except a slight hunch.
I turned so I could look at Claudia.
Her long dark hair was braided down her back. She wore a pair of loose pants and a tank top, and I knew that was probably what she’d been sleeping in. I wasn’t sure what time it was, but it was late. Or early, depending on how you looked at it.
The air was still warm from the late summer sun, and in the moonlight, I could see a little glistening of sweat on Claudia’s skin. She smelled of salt and sage and Palo Santo smoke, which meant she’d been doing some sort of cleansing spell earlier tonight.
“Did you know this was coming?” I asked her.
She shook her head slowly, giving me a look that told me she thought I was being crazy. “I’m not the one with visions.”
There wasn’t a question in there, but I knew she was asking by the way she tilted her head slightly to the side and waited.
“No. I honestly didn’t have a vision about this. I’m not covering anything up. I had been stupidly hoping to sleep tonight. With the drama from the packs and trying to prep for whatever might happen next with the fey during the day, and then slaying evil beasties at night, I’m wiped.” I rubbed a hand down my face. “But you were doing a cleansing? Just a normal thing or were you—”
“I’ve been doing them every night since we got here.” She shook her head at me. “I thought it would help, but the sirens went off, and I knew I’d failed again.” She put her arm around me, closing the distance between us. “You look tired, and I…feel guilty about it. I left and…”
I turned a little more so that I could search her face. If I relaxed a little, I could see whatever she was thinking, but I didn’t want to intrude in her mind. I found I actually liked letting people speak. It was so much more pleasant than getting a first-person look into their heads.
She felt guilty? No. None of this was her fault. “You’re being too nice if you’re taking on some of the responsibility for this.”
She started picking at some invisible piece of fuzz on her tank. “I’m not. Or not totally. I just…” She looked at me, and I saw regret in her eyes. “I’ve been avoiding coming back here. Seven months ago, I wasn’t ready for another fight. I hadn’t been ready for Astaroth, and I wanted time, but I came back to help. So after we were done, I left. It was easier to assume you were handling everything, and now I look at you, and I’m worried.”
“Are you saying I look like shit?” I teased her.
“No!” She sounded so horrified by my suggestion that I almost laughed. “I would never—”
I nudged her gently. “You’re being nice about it, but you’re saying I look like shit.” She was too sweet to say anything that rude, but I was pretty sure that’s what she meant.
She was quiet with her big brown eyes wide in shock, and then her shoulders hunched again. And I could see the surrender in her before she could even speak.
“You don’t look your best.”
“I don’t feel my best.” I leaned against her again. “We’re going on months of interrupted sleep. Werewolves recover quickly, but it’s not enough to combat the constant strain of fighting at night and politics during the day. Dastien seems to do better than me, but I can’t even anymore. I need a break.” I wiped a hand down my face. “I’m not even sure I can think straight, and the idea of waking up in a few hours to talk about what to do with the rising fey aggression again is…” I squeezed my eyes shut. I wished I was stronger. “I want to call the fey a bunch of whiny brats and tell them to go fu—”
Claudia let out a hiss. “Yeah. That’s not…don’t do that. Seriously. Don’t.”
“I’m trying…”
But I was exhausted.
But I wanted to run far away from this endless sea of evil.
But I was finding it harder and harder to care.
“I’m just tired,” I said. “I’m sure I’ll feel better in the morning.” I was saying the words, but I couldn’t make my words sound even the least bit believable.
“No.” Claudia gripped my hand in hers. “Don’t do that. Don’t lie. I’ve only been here for three days, and I need a break. I honestly don’t know how you’ve done it for so long. Those sirens…”