It seemed crazy to confront the queen, but if that’s what would get me Tessa, then I was down for a good dose of insanity. “What do you think?” I asked Michael. He was old and experienced. If he said don’t go, I’d think twice about my decision.
If his eyes hadn’t been glowing green, I would’ve thought he was relaxed when he put his hands in his pockets. But I saw that movement for what it really was. He was hiding his hands because the skin wasn’t smooth anymore. His fingers had lengthened, and my mentor, my teacher, my adoptive father who I’d thought was infallible, was slowly losing control.
That little piece of information should’ve scared me—or at least, worried me—but instead, I realized I wasn’t as alone as I’d thought.
“I think we need to talk to Helen. If we have a shot at diplomacy, then we need to try that first, but we’ll have to be very careful.” He looked at Van. “Will you take us?”
“Absolutely not! I forbid it!” Cosette said at the same time that Van said, “Yes.”
Van faced Cosette, and what followed was some sort of silent conversation that involved tiny hand gestures and a few looks. It ended when Cosette stormed out of the room.
“Damn it.” Chris shook his head as he stared at Van. “Just don’t get yourselves in trouble. I’m not sure I’d be able to keep her from coming after you, and that…” He looked at me, his eyes the wolf’s blue. “That would be very bad.” He left the room, following Cosette wherever she’d gone.
I knew I should ask why Cosette was upset, or if she had any advice for me, or if she questioned our decision, but I was desperate for answers. Desperate enough to take on the Lunar Court’s queen with no guarantees or protections.
“When do we leave?” I asked Van.
“Now. I don’t want to give her any warning, and some of the fey here may be spying for her. Helen has too many bargains tied to her—too many fey that owe her a debt—and I’m not sure what that might mean for any of us. Especially your mate.”
The fear was there, swelling up again until I thought it might drown me, but I shoved it down. I shoved it far, far down. I was alive. I was breathing. And with every breath I took, I knew she was somewhere breathing, living, fighting. I just had to find her.
Van reached a hand to me. “Are you ready?”
“Yes.” I took it and then looked at Axel. “Wait here. Chris will watch out for you.” I said that bit loud enough that I knew Chris would hear me. He’d watch out for the newly turned were just as well as I could.
Axel dropped his gaze. “Okay, but—”
Van reached out his other hand to Michael, who took it.
And then the world was black, and I was falling and twisting and turning, and I was absolutely sure I was going to throw up.
And then it all stopped, so suddenly that my legs gave out and I was lying on the ground, staring up at a massive, glittering chandelier.
Tessa said traveling this way wasn’t fun, but it was one thing for her to tell me or to see it in her memories. Living it? That was a whole new level of terrible. I absolutely never wanted to travel with Van again.
“Get up.” Van’s words—sharp with warning—were enough to have me moving immediately, even though my vision was still swirling.
But as I stood, I realized Michael was standing next to Van as if nothing were wrong.
Damn the old were. He hadn’t felt the world tumble? Or maybe it just didn’t bother him?
Van’s clothes were different—not a speck of blood—and his hand was tightly gripping the hilt of the sword that now hung at his hip. He was ready for a fight, and that meant I needed to be, too.
Van had brought us to the heart of the Lunar Court, and I was going to find answers.
As the dizziness faded, I started to take in the room around me. If it had been any other day, any other reason for being here, I would’ve been awed by the glowing walls or the galaxy floors or the countless chandeliers filling the Lunar Court’s throne room. I’d seen it in Tessa’s memory, but being here was different. The magic in the room pulsed and pushed against the pack bonds. I could feel it quietly urging me to kneel. To submit. To obey. And I found myself stumbling toward the throne a few steps to follow the order before Van’s painfully strong grip on my arm stopped me.
I looked into his eyes, and he shook his head at me. Van moved to stand on one side of me. Michael on the other.
“Find whatever strength you have inside you and use it. Now.” Van’s whispered words were sharp with command. “Or pull it from your anger that someone in this room stole your mate. Stole your bond. And you fight the compulsion to obey. Do it now or we leave.”
I wasn’t sure I was strong enough to fight the compulsion from my lunar tie, but I had anger. I had so much anger that it was slipping out my seams and spreading through the room wherever I went.
I held on to that anger. I let it fill me up—heart, body, soul—until I burned with the heat of it. And when I was done, I let it rise again. I let it burn away the wolf that was struggling to break free.
And then I felt nothing from my lunar tie. Nothing because all I had was anger.
Helen was sitting on her throne, looking down at us as if we were insignificant. As if she could control me. But she couldn’t. Only one woman could, and she was missing.