She sat on the foot of my bed. “But you don’t think they’re gone for good?”
“No. The magic is there. I felt it come back when the jars broke, but I wonder… No. It’s stupid.”
“It’s not stupid,” Dastien said. “Just tell us. We can’t help if you won’t talk to us.”
“The thing is…” Crap. I wasn’t even sure how to put this in words. “I feel it building in me sometimes. That little tingle that means a vision is coming the way it did before you bit me. But then the feeling goes away. Now, I’m wondering if I’m pushing it away. Maybe what I’m seeing is really bad, and I don’t want to see it? Maybe my mind is protecting myself? Only—”
“That makes sense,” Dastien said. “You can’t contain that kind of magic. It has to come out somehow. So, nightmares.”
“Which does me no good.” I tucked a strand of wet hair behind my ear as I processed my thoughts. “I mean, visions that I can’t see are useless.” And I’d never needed to see the future more than I did now. There were too many alphas on campus to agree on a course of action, and half of them thought that holding tight was the best plan. Which meant we were left sitting around like a bunch of morons, waiting for Luciana to make her next move.
Stupid. So freaking stupid. Not to mention frustrating. I hated doing nothing.
All the kids at school were on edge. Classes were canceled, but everyone was running the Cazadores’ obstacle course and training like they knew what was coming. The Cazadores patrolled at night, but walked through campus like God’s gift during the day. The alphas that had gathered—some of the ruling Seven alphas were here with other key alphas from around the world—spent their days arguing in the conference room, accomplishing absolutely nothing. Fights broke out every few hours as the tension brought out the wolves in all of us.
In other words, the pack was a hot mess, and it didn’t look like anything was going to change any time soon. Not unless I changed it.
“If I could figure out what I was seeing, then maybe we could actually start doing something.” I threw the pillow across the room in frustration. Maybe lack of sleep was making everything worse, but I couldn’t shake the sense of danger. “Are the Cazadores still watching my parents and brother?”
Dastien grunted. “Of course. They’re protected around the clock. Just like you wanted.”
“And Tia Rosa—”
“Left yesterday for her family’s estate in Mexico. Remember?”
“Right.” My great aunt had wanted to get far away from Luciana. At least that worry was gone. My family was safe. Whatever the vision was—it was about me.
“I know this isn’t ideal, but the Seven say we wait, so we wait,” Dastien said.
“Donovan doesn’t agree with that, does he?” I asked Meredith. She was True Mates with Donovan, one of the Council of Seven alphas that ruled over all packs. I wished he were here, but tonight was his turn for the wee-hours patrol.
“No.” She drew out the word. “But apparently he doesn’t always agree with them. And since you and I are friends, they think Donovan isn’t a fair judge of the situation.”
“That’s stupid.”
“Right?” Meredith shouted the word. “That’s exactly what I said.”
“I have to figure out what I’m dreaming.” If it was the past tormenting me, then I could deal with it. And if it was something that was going to happen, at least we could prepare.
“How?” Dastien asked.
That was the question. “I don’t know.”
“We could try yoga.” Meredith led the afternoon yoga sessions. I’d gone to a few when I first got to St. Ailbe’s, but hadn’t had time in a while. “It’s very centering.”
She might be right. At this point, I’d juggle oranges while hopping on one foot and singing the ABC’s if it’d fix me. “Okay.”
“And if that doesn’t work, maybe tiring your body out while you’re awake will give your mind a chance to relax,” Dastien said. “Either way, you need more sparring practice.”
I rolled my eyes. This had become a thing with him. All the Weres had been training to fight their whole lives and Dastien was one of the best Cazadores—the Were fighters who hunted everything that went bump in the night. I’d say it pained him that I was so bad at fighting, but I knew the only reason it bothered him was because he wanted me to be able to defend myself. Which was probably a good thing, considering.
“Fine. A little gym time won’t kill me. I’ve been spending too much time digging through old books anyhow.” I drummed my fingers against my leg. The only productive thing I’d been able to do was cook up potions. I had a whole pile of vials on my desk, just waiting for the next attack. “And if that doesn’t work?”
“We’ll go for a run. Shift.” Meredith sat on the edge of my bed. “We keep trying stuff until something works. You have to get out of your own way. Just break free from your thoughts and relax, and I’m sure your visions will come back.”
Just relax. Easier said than done these days.
As soon as I thought I had a grip on my powers, they changed again. Even if they were working normally—whatever that meant—Tia Rosa had made it clear that visions of the future couldn’t be controlled. They’d come or they wouldn’t.