It was half-past five in the morning, and he was convinced that getting me totally exhausted would loosen my mind enough that I’d finally see what I needed to see. “I’m dead. You killed me this time.”
“You’re breathing fine.” My mate’s voice lifted up at the end, and I knew he was smiling at me. He was closer now. Standing right above me even though I hadn’t heard him move. The scent of forest overpowered the plastic as he moved even closer.
“I wasn’t a second ago. Can we be done?”
He nudged my leg with his foot. “I told you I wasn’t going easy on you.”
I finally opened my eyes. I was right. He was smiling.
No. Not smiling. Smirking.
“I think we passed the ‘not going easy’ on me and went straight for ‘kicking my ass.’ Really. This is getting a bit ridiculous.”
“I have to go hard on you right now. You want to stop having nightmares, right?” I didn’t like the stress in his voice. I wasn’t the only one being affected by my dreams.
“Right.” I wiped the sweat off my face and onto my collar, but it didn’t help much. My T-shirt was already soaked through.
“Come on. I know you’re tired, but I think this is loosening you up. Just relax. Let your mind wander, and it’ll come.” Dastien reached down to me, muscles flexing under his gray T-shirt. His sweatpants hung low on his hips, and he was barefoot. The sight of him made me melt.
From the second I first saw him I’d wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anything. I’d fought our bond when I first became a Were—because the whole biting thing hadn’t gone over well—but I was done with that. Long done.
He leaned forward, patiently waiting for me to take his hand. “Come on,” he said again. When he smiled, his dimples made deep dents in his cheeks.
Damn it. He knew exactly what he was doing to me, but I couldn’t deny that face. Maybe one day I’d get used to him and I’d be able to get my own way once in a while.
I put my hand in his and instantly our bond strengthened. “I’m glad you’re enjoying this.”
His grin got even bigger. “You can’t lie to me. I know you’re having fun, too.”
“I’d rather do a different kind of wrestling on the mat.” I raised an eyebrow.
“Don’t try to tempt me with your wiles.”
I shook my head. “Wiles? Seriously?” Sometimes he acted way older than twenty.
“Let’s try it again. This time you try and take me to the mat.”
“But I don’t know what I’m doing.” A piece of my long, brown hair fell in my eyes, and I pulled my hair out of its rubber band.
“Just do whatever feels right. This is good for you, beyond helping with the visions. We’re going to be fighting for our lives. Maybe tonight. You have to be ready. I don’t—”
“Want to lose you.” I finished for him. I’d heard this speech a lot the past few days. When Luciana stripped me of my powers, it had affected Dastien in a big way. He kept worrying about losing me or losing our bond. Honestly, I wasn’t sure which of us it had hurt more. But it didn’t matter. We were dealing with the fallout together.
This was Dastien’s way. Preparing me for next time. Making sure there wasn’t a next time.
I met his amber gaze. “You’re not going to lose me.”
He pressed his lips together. “Of course I’m not. Because we’re going to be ready. I know you’re frustrated—”
“I’m not frustrated.” I tried to stay calm. Mornings weren’t my most rational part of the day.
“Don’t try to deny it, cherie. I can feel your frustration—at your visions, your lack of ability when sparing, and most of all, at what Luciana did. That’s okay. I understand what you’re going through, but you don’t get how scared I am. How hard it was being away from you, not knowing if you were okay. Then you came back, and you weren’t okay. I feel like I failed you. I should’ve stopped you from going. I knew it was a bad idea. I knew nothing good would come of you going to the coven, but I agreed for the sake of the pack. Now, you have to let me protect you. Please.”
My lip started to tremble and I bit it, trying to get it to stop the embarrassing fluttering. Those jars… It had been hard, but I’d gotten through it. I was getting through it. “I’m not broken.”
“You’re not broken, but you’re fragile right now.”
I wasn’t sure how I felt about that statement. If I was honest with myself, I might agree, but that didn’t make hearing it from him any easier. It made it more real. And that kind of sucked.