“That’s his name.”
I gave him a soft punch in the shoulder.
He grabbed my fist and opened it to link our fingers together. “My parents died when I was eight. Michael was their best friend, as were the Hoels. But Michael was the one who took me in, raised me.”
I felt terrible for asking. “I’m sorry. That must’ve been awful.”
“Thanks.”
I stared at his larger hand enveloping mine. “Why did you leave? At the party after…” He’d run away that night. It bugged me that he’d done that.
“I didn’t leave you at the party, but my wolf had control. I shifted and couldn’t let myself get close to any of the other people there.”
I remembered the wolf outside my window that night. “You waited outside my window?”
“Until your light went out.” He pressed his lips together for a second. “And I was outside your room in the infirmary as you transitioned back and forth for days on end. You didn’t stop changing forms until I finally broke into the room—”
I so didn’t want to hear about that. I slapped my hand over his mouth. He bit it softly, and I felt it all the way to my core. I rubbed my hand off on my jeans.
“I can’t undo what I did, but I can help you gain some control.”
“You can?”
They’d told me that werewolves were stronger, but I couldn’t stifle a gasp when Dastien picked me up as if I weighed nothing. He jumped onto a giant boulder.
He put me on my feet and sat. “Close your eyes.”
I plopped in front of him and closed them.
“Take three deep inhales and exhales. Feel your body move. Feel the air come in, flowing down deep into your lungs, filling up your chest. Then follow it as it flows back out.”
I recognized this from the yoga class.
“Focus on your hands…your feet…your arms…your legs…your chest. Feel the wolf deep inside of you. In the center of you, of who you are.”
I opened my eyes after a few minutes. He was sitting there with his eyes closed. I felt bad about disturbing him, but then he opened one eye.
“Close them.”
“Nothing’s happening.”
“That’s because you’re not relaxing.”
I grumbled about having a hard time relaxing on a hard rock, but he ignored me. I don’t know how long I sat there, before something clicked. I felt the rippling underneath the surface of my skin and gasped. “What is that?”
“You’ve nearly found her.”
“Her?”
“The wolf.”
“Shut up.” I slapped his leg. “That sounds completely mental.”
His golden gaze met mine. “She’s a part of you. Once you start acknowledging her, she’ll settle down and your moods won’t be so erratic. She needs to trust you as much as you need to trust her.” He laughed. I must’ve looked as confused as I felt. “Close your eyes again. Go back. See her. Feel her. She’s there to protect you. To make you stronger.”
I had thought of her as separate from me, but maybe she wasn’t. The only thing I knew for sure was that it was complicated. I didn’t really know what I felt, but when I opened my eyes again, I was steadier.
“Better?” Dastien said.