“Of course, Shane will speak first since he’s the oldest, and then you’ll speak. I’ll be the last to go. I have so much to—”
“You’ve got to be kidding.”
She didn’t seem to register his tone. She turned and moved in a stiff, awkward gait toward the far side of the little living room, then started digging through a pile of papers. “I’ve only gotten half of it written, and I still need to put together the program. I’d hoped to have that done last week.”
Alex blew out a long breath. He’d been tricked. His mom hadn’t gotten over her husband’s disappearance at all. Oh, she’d had to accept that the man was dead, since Shane had found their father’s remains himself, but that clearly hadn’t stopped the madness.
What exactly did his mom think Alex had to say about the man? From what I remember, he was a decent father, but I must’ve been wrong since he got himself killed while running off with some floozy.
Alex watched his mother read frantically over the papers in her hand, her lips moving. He recognized that bright-eyed fever. It had taken up half his childhood.
He didn’t even turn around when the door opened behind him. “You said she was better,” he said flatly.
“Alex.”
Despite his anger, he didn’t resist when Shane spun him around and grabbed him in a hug. In fact, Alex didn’t even resist hugging him back. Shit. Shane had taken care of him all those times when their mom had shut herself in her room for days. S
hane might’ve tricked him, but the man was still his big brother.
Though Alex might actually be the bigger one now. That was a little disorienting. Shane had always seemed huge to Alex.
“Jesus,” Shane said, pulling back to hold Alex at arm’s length. “What the hell happened to your hair? And your baby face?”
“The hair’s still there somewhere. But I lost the baby face a long time ago.”
“I guess so.” Shane slapped his shoulder. Hard. “Christ. Look at you.”
“Look at you,” Alex said. “You look good.” He did. Shane had grown a couple of inches himself, and he’d gotten a lot stronger, but there wasn’t any gray in his hair yet, and the lines around his eyes seemed to be from smiling. He’d always been the charming one.
Still. “This isn’t what you said it was, Shane.”
Shane’s eyes drifted past his shoulder and his smile faded. He lowered his voice. “She was getting better. I don’t know what’s going on.”
“This is better?”
“No. Two months ago she seemed more stable...I mean it,” he insisted when Alex shot him a disgusted look. “She’s been seeing a psychiatrist for a while. She apparently has something called borderline personality disorder. It makes her...extreme. I don’t know. The doctor thought this ceremony would be a good idea since Mom wasn’t exactly stable when we interred Dad’s remains last year. Closure and all that.”
“Closure. For her? Or you?”
Shane shot him a hard look, but didn’t take the bait. “For her. She’s starting to accept that he’s been dead this whole time and was never coming back.”
“Yeah. Guess I had that pegged.” The old anger was pushing through now, forcing his blood pressure up until Alex could feel his heart banging.
“As for me, I’ve spent the past sixteen years more worried about you than Dad.”
“Yeah, well...I was doing fine until you dragged me back into this.” Alex tipped his head toward their mother, who seemed oblivious to the quiet tension.
“She was better—” Shane started again, but Alex cut him off.
“Maybe you’re just too damn used to the crazy to see it.”
Shane’s jaw stiffened with anger, but his voice stayed calm and low. “I didn’t open myself back up to this until she started getting help. She’s been good. I mean it. Maybe this is just... I don’t know. Maybe it’s just coming to a head, and once the ceremony is done...”
“Sounds like the same old wishful thinking, Shane.”
Shane stared at him for a long moment, his eyes blazing with whatever he wasn’t saying. But he just shook his head. “Maybe. But I’m not going to pretend I’m sorry you’re here.”
“Shane!” their mom suddenly yelped. “Tell your brother he needs to have his speech done by tomorrow night. It can’t wait!”