An hour later, when he pulled up at the care center, his eardrums were buzzing, but his mind had cleared. He was conscious of his dusty jeans and boots when he walked in. The floor here was shiny and white and he worried he was leaving bootprints behind him.
He stopped thinking about his boots when he reached his father’s door and registered that the bed was empty and neatly made. Alarm flooded his body.
“Mr. Pearce?”
He turned to see a nurse hurrying toward him and braced himself for the words.
“Your father’s doing better, but we moved him to the hospital for overnight observation.”
“Oh.” He slumped a little, and she smiled.
“I’m sorry, I would’ve called and warned you, but I didn’t think you were coming.”
“It’s fine. He’s next door?” The small regional hospital was only a few steps away.
“Yes. Let me get you his room number.”
He managed to make it to the hospital without balking, but each step was heavier than the last. By the time he made it to his dad’s room, he felt as if he were toting two hundred pounds on his shoulders. But he felt a surge of relief when he stepped into the room. His dad was sleeping. And he looked all right.
Walker took off his hat and sat in a chair next to the bed. He didn’t bother with relaxing. He’d stay for a few minutes and then leave. He’d speak to the doctor, get the latest information; then he’d leave and call Micah with the news. Obligation fulfilled. He bowed his head and counted down the seconds.
A deep breath drew his attention, and Walker looked up to find his dad awake and watching. His face was swollen from the advancing heart failure, and with his cheeks filled out, he looked more like his younger self. Not so gaunt and sickly, despite the tubes feeding oxygen to his nose.
Walker stared at him for a long time, at those blue eyes that looked exactly like his. When his dad’s mouth curved into a smile, Walker wondered if his dad had ever looked like that in his youth. If he’d ever been happy.
“Hey, you came back to see me.”
“Hi, Dad.”
His eyes flickered with confusion, but he kept smiling. “Where’s your friend?”
“He’s my brother. Micah. He’s at work right now.”
“Ah.” His father nodded. “You look like fine men. Hard workers.” He gestured toward Walker’s clothes, but then his eyelids drooped.
Walker swallowed hard, trying to think what to say.
His father’s words meant nothing. They were a stranger’s words and not meant for him.
He didn’t want them, but they might mean something to Micah. “He just got a promotion,” Walker said, his throat thick. “Micah. He’s doing real well. He bought a house overlooking the ocean way out in Washington state.”
His dad’s eyes opened. “Yeah? That must be something to see. I’ve never seen any more water than the Great Salt Lake. It’s salty, but it ain’t the ocean.”
“I haven’t, either. I’m thinking of going out to give it a look, though. Maybe he and I could see what kind of fish we can catch out there.”
“You should do that, son. That’s what brothers are for. Do you have any other family?”
Walker met his eyes. He searched for his dad in there for a long time before he shook his head. “No. Just Micah.”
“Yeah. I...” He paused, his brow dropping until his bushy white eyebrows nearly covered his eyes. “I don’t know,” he finally said, looking away. “I’m tired.”
He looked more like himself now, frowning, irritated. Walker nodded and slipped his hat back on as he stood. “Well, I’ll leave you to get some rest, then.”
“Thanks. Listen, on your way out, will you ask someone to call my wife? She’s out in Wilson.”
Wilson. His parents had rented a place there the first year they were married. For a moment, for one awful moment, Walker considered saying the truth. That Mom was dead and had been for a long time. That she’d died tired and timid because of her asshole husband. Walker wanted to see the confusion on his dad’s face. Wanted to hurt him. And that terrible truth made Walker’s stomach flip over in his gut. “Sure. I’ll tell them. I’ve got to go. I’m glad you’re feeling better.”
He didn’t need to go anywhere, of course, but he needed to get the hell out of there. The man had tortured him when Walker was smaller and weaker, and Walker didn’t want to turn into his dad now. Hurting the weaker person just because he could.