His gaze sharpened. “I see. It’s obvious now.”
“What’s obvious?” I tried to tamp down the rising panic that was threatening to engulf me.
“You want her.”
I stared at him. “How…” I trailed off.
“Come on, I’m not blind. I see the way you look at her. I’ve seen the two of you together, at the party and, y’know, the photos and stuff. And let’s not forget our fight over her. Remember? My first practice after my suspension?”
“I remember,” I gritted out, but he hadn’t finished speaking.
“I just hadn’t realised you’d had a thing for her for so long.” He grinned. “You know she’s with Cassius Drummond now, right?”
“
She is not.” My voice came out as a low, challenging growl, and Kian laughed.
“You’ve got it bad. What’s stopping you? Think it would be weird with Ana—wait, do you still want Ana?”
“What? Ana? I already told you I was never going back there again.”
“Just checking. Okay, so what’s the problem, then?”
“She’s…she’s been targeted because of me. All the fucking rumours.”
“Rumours which you started,” he commented dryly. “So what about the rumours? People will get over it.”
My mouth twisted, and my shoulders slumped. “I just don’t want her to be hurt because of me.”
“That’s all very noble of you, but shouldn’t that be her decision as well?” He swigged from his water bottle, running his hand over his mouth, before returning his attention to me.
I sighed and filled in the rest of the gaps. “It’s not only that. There’s the fact that my parents are always on my case comparing me to her.”
His eyes darkened, and I held my breath, knowing that parents were a touchy subject for him. His parents…they were selfish assholes, to put it bluntly. “Who gives a fuck what your parents think? Seriously, mate? That’s just…” He shook his head, his frustration and disappointment clear.
A grimace crossed my face. “You know how they are. Fuck. It sounds really stupid when I say it out loud, doesn’t it?”
“Yeah, it really does. Sort your shit out, Carter. If you actually want to be with her, and she wants to be with you, man the fuck up and do it. Stop making bullshit excuses.”
I gaped at him. “Harsh, mate.”
“It’s true, and you know it.” He gave me a pointed look.
“Yeah,” I said quietly. “A while ago, I asked her if she wanted to be with me, in secret, and she said no. At the time I didn’t get it, but now…” I trailed off, realising how it must’ve looked to her. “Now I get why she was so upset. Who wants to hide their relationship? I wasn’t ashamed to be seen with her. It wasn’t fair of me to ask her to keep it a secret. She didn’t deserve that.”
Next to me, Kian went very still.
“Kian? You okay?”
“No. No, I’m not,” he mumbled. His eyes closed briefly, and then an apprehensive expression came over his face. “I need to tell you something. I…uh…I’ve been. I’ve been having a secret relationship of my own. And I think it’s beyond time it was out in the open. Time I was out.” He swallowed hard, dropping his gaze from mine. “I’m with Preston.”
“You what? Like—”
“As in, Preston is my boyfriend.”
I didn’t even know what to say. “I didn’t know you were into men,” I said eventually, shrugging.
He smiled then, glancing over at Preston, who was doing hamstring stretches at the side of the pitch. “I’m into him.” A sigh escaped him. “Really, really fucking into him. I asked him to keep it quiet. It was all new to me, you know? But—” He broke off and waved Preston over. When Preston reached us, Kian stepped forwards and put his arm around Preston’s waist, then planted a hard, possessive kiss on his lips. Preston stumbled in shock, but then a huge smile spread across his face. A couple of the guys on the team wolf-whistled in the background.