Leslie leans in to look at the screen, I press play, and we both watch several seconds of Trent jerking himself off in close view of the camera.
“Woah,” Leslie murmurs, a note of lust in her voice, and even though I’m currently thinking of ways to castrate Trent, a flare of possessiveness rises up in me before I can stop it.
But I force it down. My stupid heart and body might still be a little confused, but my m
ind has never been more clear.
No more second chances. No more trying to find peace. This is war, and there are always casualties in a war.
Leslie can look all she wants. Pretty soon, she won’t be the only one.
I pause the video and turn to her. “It’s all I have.”
“Yeah?” She drags her gaze away from the screen to me. “And what are you going to do with it?”
“I’m going to use it to destroy him.”
Interest flashes in her eyes, but she bites her lip, looking back at the video. “I dunno, Emma. Maybe he doesn’t deserve—”
“Leslie.” I cut her off, fury filling me, “Either you help me, or you leave me alone. You’re the hacker. You know how to do this shit and I don’t. But if you won’t help me, I’ll find some other way.”
She scowls, and I know she hates the position I’ve put her in. I hate it too, but I’m steeling my heart against feeling anything right now.
Like I said, there are casualties in every war, and maybe my friendship with Leslie will be the first one.
“Please,” I say, softening my voice. “I need your help. After the shit he pulled on me… He deserves this. He deserves so much worse than this. It’ll torch things between us for good. I need to do this.”
She narrows her eyes, looking from me to the laptop screen and back thoughtfully.
“Well, he has seriously hurt you,” she says, pulling a face as she considers it.
“He wrecked me, Leslie.”
“Okay.” She nods decisively. “I’ll help you. But you can’t ever tell anyone that I’m doing this. Do you promise? My parents don’t know about my hacking, and if I get ratted out, I could get in serious trouble. You’ll owe me, okay?”
“Yes. Absolutely. I promise,” I say, putting my palm up in the air.
“Jesus.” Leslie rolls her eyes, pulling the laptop toward her. “Now I have to watch this whole fucking video.”
I can’t watch. If I watch, it’ll remind me of what at the time felt like one of the best nights of my life. And I can’t afford anything that makes me weaken right now. I can’t afford any softness.
Any pity.
But I sit next to Leslie as she edits and prepares the video to upload, telling me as she works about how she’ll nudge the video to make it go viral, and how many sites we’ll upload it to.
I don’t watch, but every once in a while I glance up and get a small glimpse. I try to let the memories of that night wash over me as if they belong to someone else. Because in a way, they do.
I’m not that girl anymore.
Not only will Trent and I never have sex again, we’ll also never be friends. It’s completely over between us. Now, the only thing I can think about is sweet revenge.
“It’s done,” Leslie finally says, saving the file. “Ready to upload it?”
“Yes.” I sit up straighter, my entire body going taut.
“Okay. We’ll put it up a bunch of places, but I hacked into the school’s network, so I think the first place we should post it is the Clearwater University student portal.”
Adrenaline surges through my system.