“You don’t matter,” he says. “And I don’t care about you.”
My muscles go rigid.
You don’t matter.
Unconsciously, he’s echoing the mantra I’ve repeated to myself more times than I can count when I needed to fight back emotions rising too strong and too fast in my chest.
But this time, instead of soothing, the words hurt.
“You’re a fucking liar,” I bite out, my stomach churning.
“Am I?” He gives a half-shrug, the movement languid and smooth. “Why the hell would I lie about that? And why would I give a rat’s ass about some random chick I fucked in a bathroom? I was having a shitty day, Sparrow. And you were a hole I could fill.”
My heart is crashing in my chest like a prisoner rattling the bars of its cage.
He’s lying. He’s fucking lying, and I can’t take it anymore.
I hate the smug, controlled look on his face. I’ve seen him come apart. I’ve seen him raw and real and brutal.
And that wasn’t the mask. This is.
I want to see his ice-cold exterior crack, want to shatter it into a
million pieces. So I do the first thing I can think of.
I call his fucking bluff.
Turning in Declan and Elias’s grip, I step toward the man who’s covered in nearly as many tattoos as I am and press my lips to his. Declan stiffens, his body going rigid against mine, and Elias’s hold loosens as he lets out a shocked, choked noise.
I take advantage of the opportunity, wrapping my arms around Declan’s neck before either of them can stop me and molding my body to his, pressing myself flush against him as I attack his lips.
It’s not a sexy kiss. It’s more like I punched him in the mouth with my mouth, like we’re in some kind of no-holds-barred fight and I’m trying to force him to tap out.
But he doesn’t.
His hands land on my hips, and I expect him to shove me away, maybe make a big show of wiping off his lips as he jokes with Gray about how disgusting I am. Instead, his fingers dig into my flesh as he pulls me even closer, the hard line of his lips melting against mine as his tongue slides into my mouth. His thigh slides between my legs, and a hint of something warm and woodsy fills my nostrils as I drag in a gasping breath.
Elias makes another noise behind me, and a second later, footsteps ring out on the hardwood floor like gunshots. A hand fists my hair, forcibly dragging my mouth away from Declan’s, and Gray spins me around, his other hand coming up to clasp my throat.
“What the fuck are you doing?”
His voice is such a low growl that the words are barely intelligible, as if he’s more animal than man.
My mind is reeling. I feel like the room is spinning around me, and if it weren’t for Gray’s hold on me, I’m pretty sure I’d be stumbling sideways like a drunk. My lips tingle, and I want to brush my fingertips over them, to try to make sure they’re still actually attached to my body. But I can’t seem to get my hands to work.
If that kiss was a no-holds-barred fight, Declan just got a TKO.
I honestly didn’t expect him to kiss me back. He’s backed up Gray in every encounter we’ve had, and I can only imagine the shit Gray’s told him about me—not to mention the details of my personal life that’ve been spread all over campus.
Declan may not hate me with the same raw fury Gray seems to, but he doesn’t like me.
At least, I didn’t think so.
As if he’s somehow plucked the thoughts right from my brain, Gray’s gaze flicks toward his friend before returning to me, the blue-green of his irises churning like a choppy ocean.
“I said, what the fuck are you doing?”
My gaze locks with his, and even though my knees still feel shaky, I offer him a taunting smile. “Whatever the hell I want.”