Her chest rose and fell quickly. She looked as if she wanted to believe him, but couldn’t. It was in her to deny everything. “But Pixie changes things, I come as an all-inclusive package deal now, even my best friends can’t adapt. You have no idea.”
“Okay, I’m no expert, but I don’t see why it has to be a bad thing.”
She rolled her eyes. “You obviously don’t realize what having a child means. No matter how much friends say “aww” and coo over Pixie if they bump into me on the street, they all disappeared when it wasn’t party time around the clock, the way it used to be. I lost people because I had a baby—”
“They weren’t good friends then, were they?”
She gave a reluctant shrug and looked over the top of his head as if contemplating his remark.
Sean let go her fingers and wrapped his hands around her hips, drawing closer.
Resting his face against her belly, he thought about the fact their child had been growing there and he hadn’t known. He wanted to tell her he knew Pixie was his, to hear all about it, but he couldn’t. It had to come from her, when she was ready.
He rested a kiss on the surface of her dress above her tummy, his hands tight on the small of her back, giving a deep sigh. “Forgive me for taking off, just give me a chance. I’d do anything for you. I thought about you so much. Maybe I did the wrong thing coming straight here without notice, but I had to.”
He looked up at her, making sure she understood.
Her lashes were damp. She stroked his head with her hand.
It was enough.
Sean couldn’t get close enough. Standing, he kissed her gently. He wanted to wrap her legs around and lock them together in the most intimate way, but he was being cautious and treading carefully, measuring his responses. “Will you give me some time to prove to you how much I care?”
“A couple of hours.” She shrugged one shoulder but he could see a tiny fleck of amusement in her eyes.
It was a start. “A couple of hours it is then.”
Her eyelids shot up and she looked at him suspicion.
He lifted his hands in a sign of surrender. “Rowan, I’ll hold you down if I have to.”
A bolt passed between them, a shared sensual memory. They used to get intensely physical, especially after an argument.
She was remembering just as much as he.
He moved his hands, sliding them down her silky dress, absorbing her outline. “Like old times?”
This time she didn’t look away. “Same place, different people.”
She really had grown up, as had he. “Absolutely. Let’s relearn each other, the people we were, those we are now.” He separated from her. “After breakfast we’ll go into town, and we’ll take Pixie.”
Her jaw dropped.
“What? Don’t look so shocked. I’m adapting. I told you, just give me a chance.”
She tapped one finger against his chest. “Okay, one chance. Believe me, if you let me down…if you blow it I’ll be so angry, you’ll wish you were dead.”
Sean grinned. “I won’t.”
Chapter Nine
The day was bright but brisk, the clouds scudding across the blue sky in the breeze. Gulls soared and dipped all along the North Wales coastline and the tide was on the turn. The town promenade was never quiet, attracting visitors whatever the season. It was busy with families today, and Rowan noticed how well they merged in, despite, the novelty of their grouping.
She avoided eye contact with Sean as much as possible, concentrating on the buggy she was pushing. At first it was all she could do to nod or muster a brief response when he asked a question. Horribly self aware, watchful over Pixie, and dreading what he might ask, she found thi
s was even more difficult than she imagined, and she’d often tried to figure out what it might be like. Mostly, when she’d tried, she ended up groaning into her pillow for most of the night.
At some point she was going to have to tell him Pixie was his. The longer she left it, the more awkward it would be, she knew that. When she’d found him in the kitchen with Pixie and Nan, she wondered for a brief moment if Nan had already broken the news, but there would have been more drama, surely. Vowing to do it before the day was out, she tried to figure when might be best. After a nice home cooked meal and a bottle of wine, maybe. Yes, that evening, when Pixie was asleep. She didn’t want Pixie to be confronted by the sight of her dad running for the hills.