“B-but people will see us. We can’t,” I whisper, kissing him, contradicting my words, getting him hotter.
“Let them.” He bites at my lower lip, adjusting my legs around him for a firmer grip, and then puts his hands under my dress and plays with my clit. “Let them see, Pixie. Let them point fingers, curse at us, talk about us. Let them think we’ve got no morals. Because trust me, baby, they are liars. They’ll pretend to be disgusted but when they’re alone, they’ll jerk themselves off. They’ll think we wanna love like them. We wanna be legends like them.”
I’m delirious with lust. My desire is leaching out of my core and drenching his fingers, making wet, sucking sounds. All I know is that I want him inside me. Fuck the streets. Fuck the people. I don’t have it in me to even put up a mock protest.
“Abel…” I whimper.
“But they can’t be, right, Pixie?” He rolls his hips, his hands moving away from my pussy and kneading my butt. “They can’t be legends because there’s only one Abel and Evie, right? Only one Abel and his Pixie. And no one loves like us.”
Yes. No one. Not a single person can love the way we do. Not a single person can understand our desire to flaunt our love.
I’m so turned on, it aches. It literally aches.
“Fuck me now, okay? Just fuck me.”
Chuckling like the devil, he does. He gets his dick out and in me in a flash, and closing my eyes, I smile. This is it. This is our love. Shameless, reckless, a little painful, and a lot glorious.
It’s perfect.
Or rather it would be, if not for this teeny-tiny doubt in my mind.
I don’t know why but I still think that Abel is hiding something from me. I can’t be sure but I have this feeling that just won’t go away. Every time I ask him about his job, he freezes up. Sometimes he avoids talking about it. Sometimes he grows irritated with my questions. He stays up late at night working on his computer but if I catch him, he snaps the lid shut.
Or at least, I think he snaps it shut. I don’t know.
I don’t know if it’s in my head or what. Because my head is not a great place to be. Sometimes I see my dad on the streets. I don’t get spooked the way I did the first time, but still my heart jolts. I hear his voice in my dreams or nightmares, rather. His prophecy about how Abel will be my downfall. And I end up hugging Abel tighter. I can’t make this insecurity go away.
My dad planted a seed of doubt inside me and I hate him for that. I hate myself for tainting the trust I have in my Abel.
I hate that one day the doubt gets so bad that I go behind Abel’s back and open his computer, which is lying on the kitchen counter. I want to see what he works on. But as soon as I open it, a video starts up. A sexy video. A couple is making out, naked. Oh gosh. My cheeks burn even though I’ve seen such things with Abel a few times after we moved here.
The girl is dark haired, her face bunched up in ecstasy and with a slamming heart, I realize I know her. I’ve seen her somewhere, which is ridiculous because where would I have seen her? But for the life of me, I can’t deny that she somewhat looks familiar.
I’m trying to place her and hoping that soon she’ll unclench her facial features or hopefully, the guy’s muscular back won’t block her face as much, when Ethan walks in and my embarrassment gets through the roof.
I hit pause and sit up. He looks at me and then, at the computer. “What are you doing with it?”
“Uh, nothing.” I fidget in my seat.
“That’s mine,” he tells me before snatching the laptop away, making me jerk and flush hotter than ever.
“Oh, I’m-I’m sorry. I was just… I thought it was Abel’s.”
“It’s not.” Ethan presses the computer to his chest, frowning, and then asks in a suspicious tone, “Why were you looking at it when he’s not here?”
“I, uh… Because…” I swallow, my heart hammering. “W-Well, can’t I? I mean, he’s my fiancé. I’m sure I can look at his computer.”
My tone is defensive. Ethan knows it. I know it and I’ve never felt more ashamed of myself. I don’t know if he can tell what my intentions were or if something is wrong but I can’t stand his scrutiny.
What would Abel think if he knew I was spying on him?
I excuse myself and lock myself in our room. Damn it. I can’t believe I did that. I can’t believe I let my dad get to me.