Nate grimaced and tugged a hand through his hair. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“You don’t—” She shook her head. “What about Henry?”
Nate sneered as he stood. “You mean Henry who broke up with me weeks ago because he didn’t want a long-distance relationship?”
She blinked. “Weeks ago?”
“Yeah, if you ever bothered to, you know, speak to me lately, I might’ve had a chance to tell you. But no, you’ve freaking lost your mind. Drinking. Going out every night. Screwing your boss.”
Her lips fell open.
He scoffed. “Like I didn’t know. I’ve heard you talking to him on the phone. Blaine told me who Donovan is.”
“He’s not my boss.”
“Whatever he is. You barely sleep anymore. You come home at all hours.”
She couldn’t believe she was getting berated by a teenager. “I’ve been seeing someone. Sue me.”
“Sue you?” His jaw clenched. “God, you don’t even see it. But then, I guess you wouldn’t.”
His dismissive tone pushed all of her bitch buttons. Her emotions were too raw, too exposed for this right now. “See what? That my little brother is jealous that I’m dating someone?”
“Jealous? I don’t care if you’re seeing someone. I care that you’re turning into our fucking mother.”
The accusation stabbed right through her, ripped downward. “Nate.”
“How long before you lose your job? Or go nuts because he breaks your heart? Or—”
“Come at you with a kitchen knife?” she asked, unable to stop herself. “Is that what you think?”
He stretched his arms out to his sides. “How the hell am I supposed to know, Mar? Maybe. You’re scaring the shit out of me. You used to be able to tell if I had a bad day just by looking at me. I couldn’t hide anything from you. But this last month, I’ve gone through the worst breakup of my life, have barely been able to deal with this move, and then I freaking started up something with a girl. I could be bi. I have no clue what to do with that. I don’t want to be that. And the one person who could maybe help me piece all this shit together has forgotten I exist. And I could be losing her like I lost Mom. I could be watching it happen right before my eyes and not be able to do a damn thing about it.”
Every word was like a cut to Marin’s skin. But when Nate’s eyes filled with tears, she bled full-out. Her brother was terrified. She’d been so wrapped up in her own thing that she’d failed to see the person most important to her in the world waving his arms for help. She’d met Donovan and sent Nate to the back of the line.
Nate crossed his arms, holding his elbows tight, and the tears finally fell.
Her feet moved forward on their own, every bit of anger in
side her slipping away. Nate flinched when she touched him, but then he let her wrap her arms around him. The tall eighteen-year-old kid folded in her hold, sagging into it and crying. Nate was one of the toughest people she knew. He’d handled so much. But sometimes she forgot how vulnerable he was, how young. He was in this world alone except for her. She was the anchor, and she’d let herself become unmoored, leaving him to float away. She’d become unmoored by a guy. By a relationship that guy didn’t even want.
She knew she wasn’t her mother. But this part, this part seemed all too familiar. She’d fallen headlong into something and had lost sight of everything else. And Nate’s words rang all too clear. Next you’ll be losing your job.
That was a painfully real possibility. She’d planned to go in to Dr. Suri’s office and tell the truth, that she’d been as much an instigator of the relationship as Donovan had been. But what if that meant she’d be let go, too? In all this, she’d forgotten why she was here. This job meant Nate’s schooling. This job meant security for them both. Without it, they were back to scraping by, Nate’s dreams would drift past without him and so would hers. If she told the truth, she was risking everything. She was risking Nate.
She tightened her arms around him. “I’m so sorry, honey. So sorry. But you don’t need to be scared. I promise I’m okay. It’s all okay. I’m just dealing with the oldest mistake in the book—falling in love too quick and too hard.”
Nate lifted his head at that, surprise all over his tearstained face. “You’re in love with the guy?”
She wiped at his tears with the back of her hand and shook her head. “Doesn’t matter, kid. He doesn’t feel the same way. It’s done.”
He frowned, his eyes searching her face as if just noticing her disastrous state. “I’m sorry, Mar.”
“Yeah, me, too.” She gave him a sad smile. “And I’m sorry about Henry.”
Nate pressed his lips together like the pain was almost too much to voice. “He didn’t just break up with me. We waited for each other all that time. But the second week I’m gone, he went to a party and slept with someone. I know you think I’m young, but I thought he was it for me.”
“The One,” Marin said softly.