Marin’s nerves curled in her belly. “Why haven’t you?”
He let out a soft laugh. “Because my wife would kill me if I tried to move her out of state and because I’m never giving up this office. I can’t let Dr. Englebreit win.”
She let out a little laugh even though anxiety had clamped her in its grip.
“But I think you should take the interview. Dr. Suri is tough, and she’ll demand a lot of you if she hires you, but she’s a good supervisor. She’ll challenge you.”
Marin looked away. She didn’t want to seem ungrateful. But giving therapy to a bunch of spoiled celebrities and rich people wasn’t just galaxies outside her comfort zone. It flat-out terrified her. She wasn’t equipped for that. “I’m not sure—”
“You’re a brilliant researcher, Marin. You’ve been an asset to this department, and I’ve enjoyed seeing how you’ve grown here. But I think you’re limiting yourself. You shouldn’t avoid clinical work because you’re scared to be out in the real world. I worked in the field a number of years before I came back to academia, and the experience was invaluable. You can always come back to this, but for now the higher salary could support you and give you some left over to help your brother. And once you have your clinical license, you’ll al
ways have something to fall back on if you need it. The Grove is a big hitter to have on a resume.”
Marin swallowed hard. She hated that he’d pinpointed her apprehension so easily. That thought of being out in the real world, trying to help people with their problems, had anxiety crawling over her like swarming ants. She hadn’t been able to help her own mother, how the hell was she supposed to help anyone else? But what other options did she have? All the other local postdoc positions would be filled by now. And she didn’t want to have to move to God knows where and be even farther from Nathan to find something else. She also couldn’t go home unemployed, nearly broke, and with no prospects on the horizon. They wouldn’t last two months without her paycheck coming in.
She rubbed her hands on her slacks, her palms clammy, and looked up at Dr. Paxton. “Well, I guess I better plan a visit to the bayou.”
“Excellent.” His smile lifted the lines in his face and he gave her a nod. “I’ll tell them to give you a call and set something up.”
She blew out a breath and stood.
Dr. Paxton rose from behind his desk and stepped around it.
Marin put out her hand. “Thanks, Dr. Pax. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you going to these lengths to help me find something. I know you didn’t have to do that.”
Dr. Paxton took her hand and instead of shaking it, stepped closer. Then the ever-professional professor pulled her into a hug. She stiffened with surprise at first but then relaxed into the gentle warmth of the gesture. She closed her eyes. He smelled like libraries and black coffee and her version of safety.
He leaned back, his hand clasped on her arm and a tenderness in his eyes, and gave her arm a gentle squeeze. “You’re going to be just fine, Marin. You’ve survived much worse than this and have landed on your feet. I have nothing but full confidence in you that you’ll make a brilliant therapist. The Grove would be lucky to have you.”
Her eyes burned, tears threatening for some reason, and she gave a quick nod. “Thank you.”
He gave her arm another pat and then stepped back. “Let me know how the interview goes, all right?”
She told him she would and headed out of the office. The hallway was buzzing with students and activity as she walked toward the quad, the familiar sounds making her want to cry even more. This wasn’t going to be her place anymore. This wasn’t her home. She’d spent so many years here, learning, growing, finding who she wanted to be. She passed the door of the sleep lab and got an old, familiar pang of sadness. She’d even lost her innocence here and had her first heartbreak.
Now she’d have to face what was outside these walls. The world. Real life. She couldn’t be a student any longer. She couldn’t hide.
She pushed out into the spring sunshine and tried not to dissolve into tears.
6
Donovan woke up with a booming headache and the cloying scent of lavender filling his head. He grimaced and rolled his face into the pillow. The smell only got stronger, confirming it wasn’t his pillow. Or his bed. Fuck.
He turned his head and forced his eyes open, the morning light piercing his brain like tiny knives. Eyelet curtains blew in the breeze of the open window, the sound of the ducks puttering around the pond nearby drifting in. Great. Not only had he fallen asleep in the wrong bed, but he was all the way across campus, late, and hungover. Dr. Suri would shit a brick if she found out. He reached for his phone, which he’d managed to leave on the side table but not set his alarm—brilliance in action—and hit the speed dial.
His assistant, Ysabel, answered on the first ring. “I’ve already rescheduled your eight o’clock and pushed the morning group back a half hour.”
Donovan let his head fall back to the pillow. “I love you, Ysa. Marry me.”
“You’re not my type. I need more boobs and less penis.”
“I could work on the first if you keep bringing in those beignets from the Morning Cup. But the penis has to stay.”
“I’m out, then. What’s your ETA?”
“An hour?”
“Be quicker. Dr. Suri called for you earlier. I told her you were on the phone. She didn’t leave a message because she was walking into a meeting, but you know she’ll call back when she gets out.”