“And they’re not important.” This time there was no disguising the scathing edge, but I had an odd feeling that it was aimed just as much at himself as at me. “Nothing and no one else matters until the task that lies before us is completed.”
I snorted softly and reached for the open bottle of Coke sitting on my desk. “And when this task is completed and you go back to hunting those who come through the dark portals, you still won’t see them, will you?”
“Do you not have work you must do?”
Though his voice had lost the edge, there was a hard glint in his eyes and Valdis still flickered with angry fire. Frustration ran through me, but I resisted the urge to stoke the fire a little more and took a drink instead. He’d told me a whole lot more in those brief few seconds than he ever had about his reaper life, and while it was nowhere near enough to quench my desire to understand him more, I knew it was better to back away for the moment. Push too hard, and he’d make like a clamshell and not say anything else at all.
So I simply got back to work. It took me a couple of hours to get all the accounts done. Once I’d changed into clothes that weren’t literally falling off me, I headed downstairs to help out with the waitressing. Tao was in the kitchen, but we were so damn busy that we barely had time to even smile at each other.
As it neared midnight—and the end of my shift—I counted the takings and secured the cash upstairs, then grabbed four glasses of ice and Coke and shouldered through the kitchen’s double doors. The only person in the kitchen was our pot washer, Frank. Neither Tao nor Rachel, our other chef, was in sight, although the fridge door was open and the toe end of a brown work boot was visible. It had to be Rachel’s—it was too small to be Tao’s.
“Where’s Tao?” I asked, handing Frank his drink.
The older man shrugged and wiped the sweat from his face with a brawny arm before accepting the glass with a smile of thanks. He was slightly simple, but he did a damn fine job and he seemed to enjoy it. At least he was reliable, unlike some of the kids we employed.
I swung around and headed for the fridge. “Hey, Rachel,” I said, popping my head around the corner of the door. “There’s a drink on the counter here for you. Where’s Tao?”
“Outside I think, and thanks.”
She didn’t look up from her stocktaking, and I spun and headed out. The rear door was open, and the breeze was icy compared to the heat in the kitchen. I paused in the doorway, allowing my eyes to adjust to the darkness, but didn’t immediately spot anyone.
I frowned. “Tao?”
There was a pause, then, “Here.”
My gaze swung to the left, and even then it took me a minute to find him. He was hunkered down in the shadows of the Dumpster, his arms wrapped loosely around his knees.
“You okay?” I walked over and offered him one of the glasses. He smelled of sweat, grease, and ash. The latter had concern slithering through me.
“Thanks.” He reached up and took it, but didn’t lift his eyes. Didn’t look at me.
“Tao, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” His voice was monotone. Clipped. “I’m fine.”
“Then look at me.” I squatted down in front of him and gently touched his chin. I might as well have touched a furnace, and I couldn’t help the reflex to jerk my fingers back.
“Yeah,” he said. “Nice, isn’t it?”
“And the reason you’re out here, I’m gathering.” The fire elemental he’d consumed—the one he was locked in a constant battle with over control of his own body—didn’t do too well in darkness and cold. Normally he’d just retreat to the freezer when the thing inside him started to threaten again, but with Rachel in there doing a stock take, the night air was the next best bet. I touched his chin again, ignoring the sting of heat as I forced him to look at me. His eyes—normally a rich, warm brown—were alien and fire filled. “Never turn away from me, Tao. You are not a monster, not now, not ever. Not to me, not to Ilianna, not to anyone that will ever matter.”
He jerked out of my touch and snorted, the sound sharp with disbelief. “You say that now, but when the monster gains control, it’ll be another damn story—”
“But it won’t,” I said sharply. “Because you’re stronger than it is. So stop sitting there feeling so damn sorry for yourself and tell me about your date last night.”
Just for a moment, I felt the flash of his anger—it rolled over me like the heated wind of a desert, drying my skin in an instant and sending little sparks dancing across my sweater. Then it dissipated, and he chuckled softly. “You really do like tempting the devil, don’t you?”
“I have to deal with the devil in the form of Madeline Hunter on an almost daily basis, so maybe I’ve just become a little blasé about it.” I sat down beside him, my shoulder touching his lightly. Although the heat was fierce, the tension within his body began to dissipate almost immediately. “And you avoid talking about your dates only when they go like crap. What happened?”
“Nothing. She was lovely, we had a good time, and we parted making plans for another date.”
“So why all the doom and gloom?”
He sighed. “Because I’ll have to break it off. She really is nice.”
I frowned as I took a sip of drink. “I’m not understanding the logic of that statement.”
“It’s this.” He waved a hand down the length of his body. “How can I commit to anyone for any amount of time when I have no idea just how long—if ever—it’s going to take me to control this thing?”>“There are male clothes upstairs. If Lauren is not the sorcerer we seek, then perhaps she lives with him.”