And though it went against every grain in his body, he returned to the couch. He suppressed the memories of his past and the horrid Christmases that his family had shared. He would do it for Pepper and the baby.
“How can I help?” he asked.
She shook her head, not looking at him. “It’s fine. I’ve got this. I’m sure you have more important things to do.”
“This is important to you, so it’s important to me.”
That got her attention. She turned to him. Her green gaze studied him. “Why?”
“Why what? Why am I helping?” When she nodded, he said, “Honestly, because you want me to.”
“Why do you still hate Christmas after all these years?”
Her question poked at him in the most sensitive spot. He didn’t talk about his past with anyone, including his own mother—especially his mother. If it were up to him, he’d just as soon forget about the past—about Christmas, about family.
But Pepper and soon the baby weren’t going to make that possible. Instead, he would have to figure out a way to deal with it. He just wasn’t sure how to do that except to push through and do what needed to be done as quickly as possible.
He reached for a box of ornaments. “Shall I put these on the tree?”
“You aren’t going to answer my question?”
“It doesn’t matter.” It did matter. It mattered a lot.
But he didn’t want to scare Pepper away for good. And so he kept quiet about the other skeletons in his closet. It was just the way it needed to be.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
TALK ABOUT YOUR MYSTERIES.
Simon Ross was one walking puzzle.
And Pepper wanted so badly to sort out the pieces that made him whole. But she had to be careful how hard she pushed him for answers. Or he’d totally shut down on her.
Pepper picked up the string of twinkle lights. They were assorted colors. She loved colors. It was a part of her mother that had rubbed off on her. The older she got, the less she cared about what people thought of her and just let herself enjoy her differences.
Except Simon.
She did care what he thought of her. She knew she shouldn’t, but she couldn’t help herself. It wasn’t that she was going to change herself to suit him, but now that they were living together, she hoped he’d continue to accept her with her sometimes out-of-control hair and her eccentric tendencies. Perhaps she was more like her mother than she’d ever considered.
“Something on your mind?” Simon’s voice drew her from her thoughts.
“Ah, yes. I was wondering if I got enough lights.” Her gaze moved to the two bundles of lights and then moved to the tree. “The tree looks a lot bigger than I remembered.”
His gaze moved to the bundles of lights. “Did you get those from your apartment?”
“Um, no. They still haven’t let me inside.”
The truth was she’d purchased them from a thrift store. It was where she made a lot of purchases. Paying for the bakery took most of her income. What was left, she had to budget carefully. Still, she just couldn’t imagine telling this man, who could afford to buy anything his heart desired, that she was decorating his place with secondhand decorations.
“Let’s see about getting the lights on the tree.” And just like that he let the subject of the lights’ origins drop. Either he knew or it wasn’t important to him. Either way, she was relieved.
And so they worked together for the next couple of hours placing the decorations on the tree. She’d greatly underestimated its size. The decorations were sparse. She felt terrible.
Ding, dong.
“I’ll get that,” Simon said. “It’s about time the pizza got here.”
Pepper continued to study the tree, trying to figure out how to improve it. If it were in her apartment, she wouldn’t have bought one nearly so large, because her ceilings weren’t nearly as high. And the decorations wouldn’t look so sparse. But here in the luxury penthouse, it looked all wrong.